Heartbreaker
by antilogicgirl
Summary: Gojyo breaks one too many hearts, resulting in a nightmare for the group, because his stint as a woman is quite permanent. [Genderbender]
1. Part I: That Old Black Magic

**Title:** "Heartbreaker"

**Author: **antilogicgirl

**Fandom: **Gensomaden Saiyuki

**Genre: **Gender-benders

**Inspiration: **silly fan-art and swing music.

* * *

**Summary: **Gojyo breaks one too many hearts. The result? Well, it's both his dream come true, and the Ikko's worst nightmare, because his stint as a woman is quite permanent.

* * *

**A/N: **Okay. I hope you like this. The idea came to me while I was looking at some pretty silly fan-art. It was basically a gender-bender of Gojyo, which had a little cartoon panel at the bottom. Gojyo was looking down his(?) shirt at the boobs within and smiling to himself. He said that if anyone needed him, he'd be in the shower. Well…if Gojyo were to become a woman suddenly, would he _really_ be that happy? In my humble opinion, I don't think he would. So, here's what I think _would_ happen. Or at least, part of it. This will be a multi-chaptered thing.

* * *

**Part I: **That Old Black Magic

Sighing contentedly, Gojyo lit up his cigarette. "Would you like one, sweet-heart?" he asked the curvy brunette that was pasted to his side. Her bottle-green eyes peered up at him before she shook her head. Hot skin stuck to his, that half-slick feeling of post-coital sweat feeling familiar and comforting. She had been quite a wild one, this girl. Gojyo was sure she wasn't any older than eighteen, and he usually was attracted to women closer to his own age that had a bit of time to gain more experience…but there had been something about Meili that had drawn him in and even now didn't want to let him go.

"Gojyo," the girl said lowly, her lips grazing over the skin of his neck and making him shiver. He made an inquisitive sound, and she fixed him with her mesmerizing eyes, "My father…he is expecting me back soon."

He shifted where he lay in the bed. "If you gotta go, then you gotta, honey. I'm not gonna stop you." He peeled his fingers away from where they had been nestled against the swell of her hip, allowing her to move if she really wanted to. Gojyo never had been one to make more of his trysts than he knew he could handle. This was no exception.

Meili's hand grasped at his. "No. You must come with me."

That statement sent his mind into a lock-down of confusion. "Wha…_why_?" His red eyes widened with the confusion that arrived when she said that, and even more when her eyes narrowed at him.

"Because…I chose you, Gojyo. I laid with you, and now we must be joined. You _must_ come with me, that we be joined as one by my father and live with the tribe." How could…how had Gojyo not thought of this? How did he not fucking _see _what was going on?! The girl's father had been in the tavern, after all, and the bastard had even smiled at him when he took her by the hand to lead her out of the place. His eyes closed tightly before he smoked the remainder of his cigarette in one drag.

When he opened his eyes again, he snuffed the thing in the ashtray by the bed, and dragged his hand through his hair. Then, he finally felt the situation sink in. At that moment, he jumped out of the bed, backing away from her until his naked shoulders bumped against the wall. "No way," Gojyo's hands came up in front of him in a defensive posture, "I can't…I can't get married, Meili."

"But," she looked for a moment like she was going to cry, but then she sat up, swinging her legs over the side of the bed. Her eyes almost _glowed_ with anger. "Sha Gojyo," Meili's delicate features collapsed into a frown, her voice coming out in a very low growl, "is this your decision? You will not be my husband?"

Without hesitation, Gojyo explained himself. "Look, honey, you're really nice, a sweet girl, really. And I'm sure you'd make a great wife, but I can't be anybody's husband. I'm not the most…faithful type, and you can't tell me you didn't see it either. I'm crude, I sleep around, I have very few redeeming qualities. And for fuck's sake, I don't _want_ to be married yet! I'm only twenty-four!"

One of the woman's dark brown eyebrows rose, her eyes now _actually_ beginning to glow. Her body rose to a standing position and she walked slowly over to where he stood. The light of the moon bathed her skin, and added to the unearthly quality of her overall appearance as she almost seemed to glide in his direction. A strangely familiar-looking smile graced her lips, and for an instant, he was reminded of one very sadistic monk that only smiled like that before he shot at him. "Well, then…" her tone was seductive, and Gojyo felt her hands slide over the skin of his chest, his breath trying to speed up. She knew how to push his buttons, that was for sure. Grabbing two handfuls of his hair, she pulled him down to her, speaking against his mouth. "You will never again break a woman's heart, Sha Gojyo."

With that, he felt his mouth being forced open by her lips as she kissed him forcefully. This set his body on fire, but paralyzed him as he felt the burning intensify past the point of pleasure. When the girl drew away from him, he was sliding down the wall, curling in on himself and trying not to bite his tongue from the pain that spread through his body. He couldn't understand the mutterings issuing from the woman that stood over him, but he saw with horror the strange green light that began to surround him, tiny lights like fireflies swirling around his body…until they dove into his skin.

No part of his body was spared from this agony. He felt like he was being stabbed over and over again by millions of white-hot ice-picks all over his skin, and inside him, as well. When he could breathe, the air was scalding, searing at his lungs and ripping at his throat. Gojyo began shaking, every muscle tensing to the point where he thought he might break his own bones. Tears had long since begun to flow from his eyes, and he whimpered constantly, not caring that he showed weakness. No pain he had ever felt could have prepared him for the torture he underwent during what seemed like an eternity.

When Meili dressed herself, she ran a teasing finger down his neck, and he finally gave a strangled scream collapsing to the floor in a prone position, blackness enveloping him and welcoming him to the bliss of unconsciousness.

* * *

The sun streamed into the windows, the light of a beautiful dawn in the desert. Hakkai smiled wanly as he sat up in the narrow bed he had been assigned. It had been a blessing that they got their own rooms, rather than sharing again. Of course, he did not particularly mind rooming with any of his companions. He merely wished for quiet every now and again. But with the others around, this was a luxury he was rarely afforded. So he flopped down onto his stomach and gathered the pillows under his chin to watch the sun come up.

When half of the golden ball of the sun had risen up over the desert, he rose and pulled on a fresh pair of pants and a comfortable t-shirt to go and wake his traveling companions. Knocking on Sanzo's door, he called quietly, "Sanzo, the sun is up," before he cracked the portal open a bit.

The monk was still lying in bed, but his eyes were open. "I'll be down to breakfast in ten minutes, Hakkai."

Nodding silently, and with a smile, Hakkai closed the door and moved on to Goku's room. He did not bother to knock. The boy was sprawled in what appeared to be a very uncomfortable position, half-hanging off of the bed and snoring with his head nearly touching the floor. Suppressing a laugh, he walked over and poked the overly hyper twenty-year-old in the short ribs. A loud snort was followed by a groan and Goku's eyes opening. "Wha?" The boy asked sleepily.

"It's time to get up, Goku. Breakfast in ten minutes. I believe that they're making a lovely beef omelet." Of course, mention of food had the boy awake and aware enough to push Hakkai out of his room so that he could shower and dress. The dark-haired man chuckled heartily at the other demon's constant need for food. On his way to Gojyo's room, Hakkai hesitated. The last time they'd had their own rooms had resulted in a very awkward situation when he'd gone to wake the man up. When given the opportunity, Gojyo's 'morning constitutional' was nothing more than another romp with whatever vixen he'd brought to the inn the night before.

It had been Hakkai's unfortunate experience to interrupt one such, and he believed himself to be mentally scarred from it. Honestly, he was unaware that the human body could bend into that position, let alone _move_ in it. And the more he thought about that incident, the less he wanted to disturb the redhead. But, he thought of how cranky Sanzo could be in the morning, and if they weren't on the road in about an hour and a half, Hakkai might find himself on the business end of a Smith and Wesson .38 caliber pistol that had the ability to annihilate his existence. No, he _had_ to wake his friend, awkwardness or no.

Shaking himself, he continued to the end of the hall, where Gojyo was surely—or at least hopefully—still asleep. Knocking softly, he said, "Gojyo," in a firm tone, "It's time to get up," There were no carnal noises coming from within, so he was glad that he wouldn't be interrupting anything as he pushed open the door. The bed was empty, but had clearly been…used. Confused, he stepped inside and closed the door behind him. Checking the bathroom first, he found that empty, so then moved around the room, pulling open the curtains to get a better look at the place.

Instantly, he saw something that made his eyes widen in alarm. A red-haired woman lay naked on the floor in the corner, curled into a half-fetal position, her hair covering her face. What happened here? Gojyo was gone, and the woman he'd brought here looked as if she'd been thrown to the floor? Hakkai's alarm rose further when he approached her. "Madame?" When the woman did not respond, he knelt next to her, pushing hair away from her face, and his eyes widened in abject horror. "Oh, gods preserve us…"

Feminine features were relaxed in sleep, lightly tanned skin smooth and flawless, except for two scars on her left cheek. He knew those scars far too well. Finally, something snapped in his mind, and he though he couldn't understand what was going on, he knew one way that he could come to a right comprehension of it very, very quickly. Hakkai's hands grasped slender shoulders, pulling the feminine body upright, and he shook hard.

Almost instantly, he felt small hands gripping his biceps, and an indignant cry escaping the woman he was shaking. He saw a pair of almond-shaped eyes open and glare red fire at him, and then his grip was reversed and he found himself planted face-down on the floor with one arm twisted painfully behind him. A very female, but husky voice growled, "What the fuck, Hakkai?" The knee between his shoulder blades was sharper than he remembered, and the grip on his wrist was not quite as crushing as it once had been, but now he was almost certain.

"Um…is that you…Gojyo?" he asked, looking across the room at the stand-mirror where he saw the lithe female body pinning him to the floor that seemed to be the womanly version of his friend and companion. Hakkai watched those delicate features begin to frown, but then red eyes blinked and his arm was released. When he managed to scramble to his feet, Gojyo was staring intently at his (her?) hands.

A low growl began to develop in the back of Gojyo's throat. For some reason, it seemed more threatening with him in this form. The kappa spun around and strode over to the stand mirror, goggling at the feminine curves of the body in which he was now trapped. "Oh, this is just un-fucking-believable!" he (she…it?) growled. Gojyo stared into the mirror, examining his face. "Hakkai…" Gojyo said slowly, "…I'm dreaming…right?"

Shaking his head slowly, Hakkai said, "I'm afraid not, Gojyo." He drew a shaking breath as his friend's own breathing became erratic. It was almost as if…No, it was certain. Gojyo was trying not to cry. Hakkai was torn between leaving the room to give him some time to think about what to do and draping a blanket over the confused redhead and holding him until he was done crying.

He settled for taking the blanket from the bed and handing it to Gojyo. "Here." A shaking hand took the thing and threw it over shoulders that were much more narrow than those Hakkai was used to seeing on his friend. In fact, if this change was permanent, there were a lot of things that would take some getting used to. Gojyo had gone from being six feet tall to being shorter than Hakkai's five feet, eleven inches. By a rough estimation, Hakkai would say that Gojyo had lost a good three inches of height.

Red hair hung down into his friend's face, and blanket-covered shoulders started shaking. What Hakkai first took for sobs turned into a low, musical laughter. Confused, he blinked slowly, watching as Gojyo turned around and shook hair from his face. "Fucking gypsies…"

Hakkai's shock at those words was complete. That didn't stop him from laughing right along with Gojyo. "A gypsy, Gojyo?" The mood had gone from horrified to sardonic, and quite quickly. It hadn't been too long ago that Sanzo had said something about his promiscuity catching up with him. And it appeared that it had caught up, all right. Fast and hard, apparently. The red-headed…woman nodded. Sighing, Hakkai tilted his head to one side. "Let me see…" Readying his chi, he took his friend's head in his hands, pushing the energy through Gojyo's body and analyzing the situation.

"Well, can you fix it?"

Hakkai let go, and swallowed hard. "No," he said dully. "I can't." Gojyo's eyes widened.

One slender hand fisted in his shirt front, and there was a flash of light flickered off to the left as Gojyo's shakujou appeared in his right hand. The half-moon blade was held to his throat. "Fix it."

"I told you, I can't." The blanket fell from Gojyo's shoulders, and Hakkai looked away, blushing. "Could you put some clothes on, please?" Gojyo's eyes widened at the little tremor in Hakkai's voice, and let go of the thick green cloth. "I'll…I'll go and get you some breakfast. We'll figure out what to do in a bit." Hakkai turned to leave, his blush dissipating as he made himself breathe deeply. He heard a grunt of agreement from Gojyo, and then the door closed behind him.

* * *

"I told you, Hakkai, I don't want any delays. We've been through this how many times?" Genjyo Sanzo was far from being a morning person. He never had been. But one thing that seemed to get his goat more than anything was delays in their schedule. He nearly snorted. What schedule? They'd gotten so off track so many times that he had started wondering if they were ever even going to get to Houtou Castle.

Hakkai's smile was strained. "But there's a good reason for this delay, Sanzo. I need you to come with me up to Gojyo's room…"

Sanzo's eyes narrowed. What had happened? Did Gojyo kill a hooker or something? Well, if that had happened, then he would be more than happy to just put the world out of its misery and kill the kappa like he'd been threatening to do. After draining his teacup, Sanzo lay down his newspaper and followed Hakkai, leaving Goku to finish his breakfast for him. The trek up the stairs seemed somehow longer than it had been the night before. He was starting to get an ominous feeling. The air crackled with some kind of strange magic, and he pulled his gun.

Hakkai looked back at him. "There's no need for that, Sanzo…"

"Fuck that," the priest growled, "I'm getting some weird vibes." Hakkai nodded, but opened the door to Gojyo's room anyway. The feeling that something was wrong was only getting worse, and he fought the urge to cock the hammer of his pistol as he entered the room. At first, though, he didn't notice anything different about the room from any other that Gojyo had stayed in.

The ashtray overflowed with butts, and there was a large bottle of tequila on the nightstand that was almost empty. Sheets were twisted and halfway ripped off of the bed—evidence of whatever deviant sexual activities the man had been engaged in hours earlier—except for the blanket, which was folded neatly into a square at the foot of the bed. This was the first indication that something was wrong. Gojyo did not _fold_ anything. The man himself was seated, slumped over, on the edge of the bed. His head was in his hands, the long black coat he usually only wore in the winter time hanging loosely around his shoulders. Now the hair on the back of Sanzo's neck was starting to stand on end.

"Gojyo…Sanzo is here." Hakkai's voice sounded like he was trying not to patronize the kappa. Instantly, the seated man's posture stiffened.

It took a minute, but after a moment while Gojyo was obviously steeling himself for something, Sanzo found himself standing eye-to-eye with red eyes. That was the first tip-off. Gojyo was easily two inches taller than he was…usually, anyway. And then there was the strangely soft contours of the face…Sanzo's purple eyes widened painfully and he took a step backward. "H…Hakkai, what is that?" his hand rose, pointing a finger at what he thought was Gojyo, but there was no way that it could be.

It couldn't possibly be Gojyo, because where powerful muscles had been, there was now roundness, curves, and…_breasts_. This person was shorter, more slender, and very, very, female. This was not the perverted water sprite. It couldn't be!

"If you're referring to me," she pointed at her face, "you can speak to me, you corrupt monk."

Somehow, Sanzo had backed away until he was pressed against the door. He didn't remember moving. The set of the jaw was familiar enough, the scars, the cocky tilt of the half-smile…it _was_ Gojyo. But how the hell had this happened? Digging his hands through his hair, he groaned. "Fuck," the monk ground out, "this is pretty goddamned high on my weird-shit-o-meter…" He suddenly was faced with the rage in those red eyes, and they were coming closer.

Gojyo's voice dropped into a lower register and said, "You think I'm not freaked out by this?" Well, Sanzo thought he might have a point. If he woke up one morning and was suddenly a woman, he might have a little bit of a difficult time adjusting. "I have _tits_, Sanzo. And for some reason, I really want to _slap_ you right now." Oh, no. Not only did Gojyo _look_ like a woman, he was starting to think like one! This was going to be a problem. Then, the ranting continued. "None of my clothes fit me, and I'm not as strong as I was. This shit sucks! Fucking gypsy whores…"

A gypsy. That explained it. "Shut up, Gojyo." Those fiery eyes fixed him again with feminine anger, and for some reason he felt like he couldn't hit the kappa _quite_ as hard as he used to. Grumbling to himself he waved a hand at Hakkai, and tossed him the credit card. "Take him…her…and get some clothes that fit." Hakkai nodded silently, and Sanzo sighed as he left the room. This was going to suck. If the idiot kappa got to be too annoying, how was he going to deal with him? It was obvious that there was some kind of hormonal thing that women did that made you want to hit them while knowing that you could do no such thing. And now, Gojyo was a woman. Did shaking a woman count as hitting?

He had never been a chivalrous man, by any stretch of the imagination, but he knew that this situation was going to take some getting used to. During the adjustment period, he was going to have to at least try not to pummel the kappa. That was about as gentlemanly as he was willing to be.

* * *

Goku frowned. He'd been left to himself for most of the day. Gojyo had not been around for him to spar with, which was annoying, because he really wanted to blow off some steam. Hakkai hadn't been at the inn either to try and make him learn new math problems, which wouldn't be as enjoyable as kicking Gojyo's ass, but would have at least occupied his mind enough to keep him from wanting to intrude on Sanzo.

When questioned, his keeper only said that he sent Hakkai and Gojyo out to the market, and that they'd be back later. Goku didn't feel like going to the market. He didn't have any money, and if he went, he'd end up getting beat by shop owners for eyeing the food they sold without purchasing anything. It was early afternoon when the door to the common area of the inn was kicked open, and Goku watched Hakkai enter the room, a large bag in his arms. A flash of red behind his teacher instantly brightened Goku's mood, and he jumped up, barreling at where he knew Gojyo was.

Hakkai sensed his trajectory, and jumped out of the way. Gojyo, on the other hand, seemed to be thinking a bit harder than he usually did, and Goku flattened the redhead to the floor. His first indicator that there was something different about his friend was this odd…smell. Gojyo usually smelled like soap and something spicy, kind of like flowery wasabi. Now, he smelled like vanilla and…what _was _that? Goku leaned lower and sniffed, confused. He blinked his golden eyes down at Gojyo's face, which was staring at him in wide-eyed surprise.

The next thing that he noticed after the vanilla smell was that Gojyo's face was a little rounder than he remembered it, and then there was the soft something in the kappa's shirt that was pressed against Goku's chest. In the space of two seconds, his brain processed the following: vanilla smell…soft chest…less-sharp face…

"Gojyo…" Goku said in a very quiet voice, "…what happened to you?"

One slender leg rose to kick his backside, "If you'll get off of me, I'll tell you, monkey-boy…" The feminine growl of Gojyo's voice did funny things to Goku's mind, making him obey with alacrity. He even put out a hand to help the sprawled redhead up. It was accepted with a crooked smile. Goku couldn't believe his eyes. Gojyo was a girl! _That must suck…_ He thought, but then, it couldn't be that much different from being a man, could it? If it didn't _feel_ different, it certainly looked different enough.

Somehow, Goku thought he looked better as a girl. She wasn't big-chested like the girls that Gojyo seemed to like, but there was enough in that area to make no mistake that this was a woman he was looking at. It was a little strange, but Gojyo was pretty. Hakkai stepped forward. "Can we sit down to some lunch?"

* * *

Once Gojyo had repeated the story about six times, he (she…) was allowed to eat. He (she!) ate slowly, feeling strange. Her stomach wouldn't hold as much as it used to, which was something she'd learned when she tried to finish her breakfast and couldn't. Goku seemed happy with this, because he could eat more of the food, now that he didn't have to fight with Gojyo over it.

Clothes shopping with Hakkai was a terror. The former teacher seemed to decide that she needed to be wearing a skirt. That was _not_ an option. Gojyo had been a woman for less than twenty-four hours, and already they were treating her differently. From the knowledge of Hakkai that Gojyo had, she could excuse him for holding doors open and carrying things. Hakkai had always been a gentleman. But what was hard for her to understand was the way Sanzo hesitated before speaking, or even walking past. It was like the priest was having a harder time adjusting to the fact that Gojyo was now a woman…even more so than Gojyo was.

The clothes weren't too bad, though. In the end, she'd placated her friend by letting him buy this _one_ dress. It wasn't the flowery one that Hakkai liked. It was black, and Gojyo liked the way it looked on. If he were still a man, and saw himself in that, he'd have it off and hanging from some part of the light fixture in his bedroom in less than an hour. That was how Gojyo knew that it was sexy. The rest of the clothes that had been purchased were more practical. Close-fitting, stretchy black pants tucked into knee-high combat boots, which he thought looked pretty bad-ass, along with a dark blue t-shirt and a black leather jacket. These types of things in various colors were what Gojyo had insisted upon. There was no way that if they came across a group of blood-crazed demons that she was going to just sit back and let the men fight. Just because Gojyo was a woman didn't mean that it made her any less of a fighter. Or at least she hoped it didn't.

Of the three men sitting at the table, there was only one that seemed relatively unaffected. Goku chowed down, and didn't really pay her any mind when she didn't fight over the food with him. For that, Gojyo was actually grateful. When they had done with dinner, she poked the monkey in the side. "Hey, monkey," Bright eyes turned to look at her, curious, but with a crease between them that told of his annoyance at being poked. "Wanna spar?"

A loud laugh came from the younger man. "You bet your ass, stupid kappa!"

One slender red eyebrow rose in challenge. The normality of their squabbling brought a kind of peace to Gojyo's mind that she suddenly held fast to. In a sly tone, she asked, "Who are you calling stupid?"

Goku crossed his arms over his chest. "I'm lookin' at you, and talkin' to you, so I must have meant _you_." There was that same old glint of mischief in the wide, golden eyes that gave more comfort than Hakkai's reassurances ever could have. "You just gonna sit there, or are you coming?" Grinning sadistically, Gojyo jumped up from the table.

"Lead the way, chibi-chimp." That made Goku instantly angry, since being called little was not something he ever enjoyed. The boy growled under his breath before grabbing a handful of black leather jacket and yanking, causing Gojyo to trip and stumble until she had her balance again.

* * *

Hakkai watched as Gojyo and Goku left the building, insults flying back and forth. From his left, he heard Sanzo say, "Well. At least some things are still normal." Hakkai had to wonder. Would anything ever be 'normal' again?

* * *

Review? 


	2. Part II: I've Got You Under My Skin

**Title:** "Heartbreaker"

**Author: **antilogicgirl

**Fandom: **Gensomaden Saiyuki

**Genre: **Gender-benders

**Inspiration: **silly fan-art and swing music.

* * *

**Summary: **Gojyo breaks one too many hearts. The result? Well, it's both his dream come true, and the Ikko's worst nightmare, because his stint as a woman is quite permanent.

* * *

**A/N: **Hehe. This part…I think it might be better than the first one. Like I said before, girly!Gojyo goes to take a bath in the nearby stream. And, well…she runs into an acquaintance that might mean trouble later on. 

Inspirational music: "I've Got You Under My Skin", as performed by Frank Sinatra

* * *

**Part II: ** I've Got You Under My Skin

They'd been on the road for only a week when Gojyo's womanly tendencies started showing. She was crude, as always, but then there were times when no one could make a word come out of her mouth, and no one could figure out why. Hakkai was even at a loss as to what could have been making Gojyo give them all the silent treatment. Sanzo passed it off as female hormones and didn't bother with it. Currently, Hakkai and Sanzo were sitting on the ground during one of their nightly rests, since there were no inns within a decent distance of their route.

They leaned back against a fallen tree, watching Gojyo sparring with Goku. The monkey was not going easy on the woman, and Gojyo seemed grateful, even though Goku repeatedly got the better of the kappa. Hakkai winced as Goku's knee connected with the redhead's kidney, sending her staggering. Sanzo mused that it must be the difference in the hip width that was throwing Gojyo off. As a man, Gojyo had had narrow hips. Now, they were at least two or three inches wider, and it couldn't help that those B-cup breasts got in the way during close-quarters grappling. Knowing that it was a mechanical problem didn't really give him any information as to how the issue was to be corrected, though.

So he just twirled his head-gear on his finger, watching and trying not to wince himself when that pretty face got pummeled. Goku stopped when Gojyo hit the ground and didn't get up again. He stood over the woman, looking down at her in horror. The monkey knelt quickly and turned her over, roughly pushing hair away from her face, which was bleeding at the nose and mouth. A pained sound came from the young man's lips as he cradled the unconscious woman's head. Sanzo's eyes widened. He'd knocked her out?

Hakkai got up from where he sat, going over to check on the situation. The glow of chi surrounded his right hand, and it was not long before he pulled away. "Put her by the fire, Goku." The monkey did as he was instructed, and took out a blanket to cover her. Then he sat looking rather confused. Every now and again, he looked at Gojyo, whose face was healed, and he'd huff.

"I miss Gojyo," the boy said in a wistful tone. "He never got knocked out so easily."

Sanzo snorted. "Get used to this one," his finger jabbed at the red head that was only a few feet away from him, "because it's the only one we've got now." The boy nodded slowly, his eyes moving to look up at the sky. Sanzo's eyes, on the other hand, were fixed on the way the flames seemed to make Gojyo's hair glow. Things were far too different. He hadn't had to yell at Gojyo for coming onto girls, because…well, there just weren't that many women who were in for that sort of thing. And it was obvious that the current state of things made the formerly perverted kappa quite uncomfortable. He'd shared a room with her earlier in the week, and Gojyo had been very stiff and quiet. She'd stayed in the room, not leaving unless it was to go down to dinner.

Sanzo was not quite _concerned_, but he didn't know what to make of it. Gojyo had never really been quiet. Quiet, moody, and at times just…cold. That was what this change had done to Gojyo. It was not natural. Not that there was anything natural about being a loud, stupid pervert, either, but better the devil you know than the one you didn't, right? Well, the current incarnation of this particular devil was driving him up the wall. He hadn't needed to point his gun at anyone, or even use the harisen for three whole days.

Goku didn't goad Gojyo as much, since there wasn't much to prod the woman about. That resulted in less fighting, and consequently, less swinging of Sanzo's arm. The driving had become blissfully quiet, but it was starting to wear on his nerves. He hadn't realized how much their squabbling kept him occupied.

So in his own way, he supposed that he missed Gojyo, too.

* * *

It was the gray of dawn when Gojyo woke. The fire had smoldered into ashes, and the rest of the group was still asleep. She was a little sore, and there were bruises in places that were not worth contemplating, but it wasn't as bad as the night before. Something was off. Shouldn't it be a simple matter of adjustment, rather than getting your ass kicked? Every movement seemed to be off balance.

Goku sparred with her every night, but every night ended the same way. With the exception of last night, when he'd knocked Gojyo out, Goku ended up helping her up off of the ground, looking concerned. It was starting to piss her off. She hated being weak. In fact, it angered her so much that she'd stopped talking a lot of the time. There was little hope that things would improve, until she learned how to balance better. Once that happened, everything would be fine.

There was a stream nearby, so there was actually a chance to wash up, which she was _not_ going to pass up. Being a woman made you feel dirty faster, it seemed. So, as quietly as possible, she threw the covers away from herself, and stood. Damn, it hurt to do that. Every joint seemed sore. All the more reason to soak in the water for a while.

The walk to the water wasn't very long, but the stream wasn't visible from the camp, so there was no reason to suspect that anyone would be a pervert and peek at her. That almost made her laugh. If it had been Sanzo or Hakkai that had been turned into a woman, Gojyo would have been sitting in a tree or hiding behind a rock faster than you could say Bob's-your-uncle. Perversion seemed to be part of the DNA that had been passed down through the family. Or maybe that was from her mother's side?

It didn't really matter. She tossed her jacket aside, watching it land in a tidy little heap, and unlaced the tall boots before tugging those off and laying them near the jacket. Shirt and pants removed next, these got placed next to the water, so that they might be washed, along with her underwear and the bra that she was highly surprised that Hakkai had suggested. It was…lacy.

Then again, Hakkai always had a soft spot for pretty things, and he'd basically had a long-term relationship with a woman. He understood about those things. Gojyo sniggered a little as she slipped into the water, feeling the cool wetness flow past, caressing the skin of her calves. Wading in a bit deeper, where the water was waist deep, she dunked herself under the stream. It felt great to get the dirt off, and the cold water was doing wonders for her mood. Gojyo had never been a morning person, but one thing she didn't miss about being a man was the usual 'morning wood' that he'd had.

Smiling at the lack of morning problem, Gojyo dunked down into the water again, staying under for as long as possible. When she came back up, she just floated there, only her face above the water. _Every morning should start this way_, she thought. Gojyo's eyes caught movement off on the bank opposite the camp, and she pushed her head and shoulders out of the water. Blinking water from her eyes, she found herself looking up at a pair of intense violet eyes screened behind blood-red hair.

Kougaiji leaned on a large rock, looking down at her amusedly. "Sha Gojyo. I guess it was only a matter of time before I caught you with your pants down."

Gojyo made an annoyed sound. "What do you want?"

Those eyes were making Gojyo slightly nervous. She couldn't stay in the water, but she wasn't sure she really wanted to get out of it, either. Not with him looking at her. Kougaiji's face turned serious after a moment, and he tilted his head. "Why don't you come out of there, and we can discuss things rationally?" The way his hand tried to curl into a fist said that Kougaiji's idea of rationality was not going to be very fun for Gojyo.

There was the familiar cocking of a gun, and she spun around to see Sanzo, pointing his banishing gun at the red-haired demon. "Gojyo, get your ass out of there and head back to camp. I'll deal with him." Now, as a man, Gojyo had never been shy. But the kappa currently had body parts that neither of the other people present possessed, and that difference made her not a little self-conscious. So when she stood, Gojyo hurried past Sanzo, carefully avoiding looking his way at all as she collected all of her clothing and got dressed again.

A long jade hair-pin that Hakkai had given her held her hair in a wet, messy knot at the back of her head, and she didn't bother putting her boots back on. Gojyo just picked them up and ran. By the time she was back at camp, her blush had subsided, but there was a tremble in her knees that she didn't like. How on earth did Sha Gojyo become a prude?

It was only a few minutes before Sanzo got back to camp, his face set into a deep scowl. Gojyo was trying to dry her hair, and not having much success. It had now dampened the back of her t-shirt, and squeezing only took so much water out of the thick red stuff. The monk's grimace only got worse when he looked at Gojyo, his eyes glinting amethyst annoyance at her. Wondering exactly what it was that she had done, she raised an eyebrow at him. A familiar tick developed beneath Sanzo's right eye, and he crossed the camp faster than Gojyo was prepared for, grabbing at her wrist and pulling her to her feet again.

"Sanzo, let go of me!" Gojyo's voice rose as she tried to pry his grip away, but had no success. The monk started walking, not paying any heed to the nails that dug into his arm. "Let me—" Her voice died when he looked back at her. Those eyes…how had she ever stood up to them? A spike of something that felt a little like fear shot through her stomach, and she couldn't move, except to follow him.

Finally, when they were almost a mile away from the camp, Sanzo let go of her wrist and turned to look at her. He leisurely lit a cigarette, and then drew his gun. Pointing it at her head, he said, "Summon your weapon, Gojyo."

"Huh?" She said, confused.

The hammer of the gun cocked. "Your shakujou. Summon it, or I'll put a bullet in your pretty little face, kappa." Gojyo's eyes widened as she saw his finger starting to squeeze the trigger. The shakujou appeared in her hands in an instant, and the monk eased off of the trigger. When the gun was put on safety, and stowed in its hiding place, Sanzo growled, "Attack me."

Not questioning, Gojyo used the shakujou as a diversion while trying to land a punch to Sanzo's face. It did no good, as the punch was blocked, her arm twisted and held behind her back. "Ah…" the pain of her shoulder being wrenched was starting to be a little too much. "Fuck, Sanzo…let go..." The monk let her go, and pushed her away. Gojyo stumbled. She fumed, whirling around and glaring at the man.

"Now, without the weapon." The blonde stood lazily, as if he didn't even care that he was making Gojyo humiliate herself.

"Fine," she spat, and the shakujou disappeared. Throwing herself forward, Gojyo tried to tackle him. Sanzo smirked when he easily threw her off balance, causing her to fall. "Fuck! What is your goddamned problem asshole?!"

Sanzo dragged heavily on the cigarette he still held. "You're off balance. It's your hips." Gojyo stared blankly at him as she pushed herself to her feet. The priest rolled his eyes and threw the smoldering cigarette to the ground, snuffing it. Laying his hands roughly on her hips, he pushed slightly, and Gojyo felt like she was going to fall over. "Your hips are wider now, idiot. Widen your stance." Gojyo considered this. After a second, she figured it made sense.

Planting her feet a bit further apart, and feeling the firmer base it gave her, she smirked a little and pushed back at Sanzo. He was forced backward a pace. "Thanks for the tip, Blondie. Now…how's about we try again?"

A little laugh escaped from thin lips, and violet eyes sparkled a bit in amusement. "If you think you can handle it."

An evil smile stretched Gojyo's mouth, and she took a step toward him. "I can handle _anything_ you dish out, Sanzo." The blonde sent a punch to her stomach, which she evaded with a little effort, and took hold of the black-clad arm before he could retract it. Twisting it hard behind the monk's back, Gojyo twined one leg around his and shoved with her free hand, and he went down with a heavy thud. Following him to the ground, she straddled his back and pushed the side of his face into the dead leaves. When he tried to get up, Gojyo adjusted her grip and allowed no such thing. "I really must thank you again. Now I get to see your face when I've got you on the ground. Again. You look good from this angle, Sanzo."

The priest sent a baleful glare up at her, and growled, "Woman, you had better let me up, or I'm going to hurt you."

"You have to get up first, Sanzo." The laugh she let go sounded a bit more evil than even she meant it to. "I can keep you here for a very long time, with surprisingly little effort." The man grunted with the energy it took to strain against her, but still couldn't get out of the grip Gojyo had on him. "If you ask _very_ nicely, I might let you up."

"Fuck you."

Leaning down low, and putting a little more pressure on Sanzo's shoulder, Gojyo mustered the most feminine, seductive tone she could to put emphasis on the fact that a woman had gotten the better of him. "Oh, now that is not very nice, Sanzo…" A very evil idea entered her mind—for which she might well get shot later—but she couldn't resist. "Unless you're offering."

His struggles ceased for a moment. Gojyo's eyes widened momentarily. Sanzo wasn't _considering_ that, was he? That question was answered quickly. "Why would I want to fuck you? You'd probably try to bite my dick off out of spite."

Chuckling lightly, Gojyo let go of Sanzo's arm and stood, pulling the monk from the ground without asking if he needed help. Jabbing him in the side with one sharp finger, Gojyo said, "I was joking," before turning away and marching back to camp. Sanzo followed, at a distance that he no doubt deemed to be safe. Gojyo took a bowl from Hakkai, who looked at her questioningly. Gojyo dismissed the question before it could be asked. "The monk just had to try to be a decent human being. You know he can't do that where others can see…"

Hakkai grinned as they ate their breakfast.

* * *

_Sanzo blinked in the gray of dawn, and looked around. The sun had just started to rise, and he could see Goku sprawled out on one side of him, and Hakkai curled up across the fire-pit. Gojyo's blankets were empty. Tracks went off to the south, toward the stream. Silently cursing to himself, he got up and followed. If Gojyo couldn't fight Goku in a spar without being pounded to a bloody pulp, then she wasn't able to take care of herself. And if something happened to her, he was going to feel guilty, because he was the only one up._

_When he arrived at the water's edge, he stood behind a tree, keeping his eyes peeled for any movement that did not include the woman in the water. It wasn't difficult to keep himself from looking at her. Any curiosity about what Gojyo looked like as a woman was overridden by the need to keep her safe. And it was because of this that he caught Kougaiji trying to sneak up on her. The red-haired man stood at the water's edge, watching Gojyo with interest. His eyes trained on the slope of a shoulder, the arch of her neck. There was something in the demon's eyes that Sanzo did not like._

_Gojyo submerged her body in the stream, and then came back up, water shedding from her hair and down her chest, and Sanzo saw Kougaiji move to lean on a large rock. Gojyo sensed the movement, and turned to see the man on the bank. She seemed unaware of what she did, but she lowered her body in the water a little, trying to hide herself. Sanzo knew a threat when he saw one, and Kougaiji was a threat to Gojyo._

_"Sha Gojyo. I guess it was only a matter of time before I caught you with your pants down." Kougaiji leered at Gojyo, and Sanzo's eyes narrowed in anger. Why did that son of a bitch always have to show up to harass them?_

_Gojyo's voice made a frustrated grunt and then she asked, "What do you want?"_

_The pleased smile that crossed the demon prince's face was less than friendly. "Why don't you come out of there, and we can discuss things rationally?" Gojyo obviously hesitated as Koujaiji's hands fisted. It was evident to Sanzo that talking was not what that man had in mind._

_So what else could he do? He drew his gun and strode out into the open, aiming at Kougaiji and pulling back the hammer. "Gojyo, get your ass out of there and head back to camp. I'll deal with him." Her posture stiffened, and she turned quickly to look at him, her face flushing. He didn't know if it was in embarrassment, or anger. Did she really think she could handle this man on her own? In her current condition? Nevertheless, whatever she might have thought, she obeyed. Sanzo didn't take his eyes off of Kougaiji as Gojyo moved as fast as she could to get out of the stream._

_The man's dark purple eyes widened at the sight of a female body, and blinked several times. After a moment, the corners of that usually frowning mouth drew upward in a smile that Sanzo wanted to shoot off of his face. When Gojyo made a bee-line for the camp, the priest considered shooting. "What do you want?" He asked instead. It was as if Kougaiji did not even hear him. He was too busy staring at Gojyo as she ran back to camp. "Kougaiji…I'll only ask once more. What do you want?"_

_When those eyes fixed on Sanzo, he found himself looking at a frightening amount of desire, and he was sickened by it. "I was…looking for a fight."_

_A sadistic smile came over Sanzo's mouth. "I'll be happy to oblige."_

_The demon laughed airily. "No…I'd rather fight with…her."_

_His smile faded, and his finger squeezed a bit harder at the trigger. "Not happening, asshole. Leave. **Now**." Kougaiji left, but promised to return for his 'fight', and for the Maten Sutra. Shaking with rage, Sanzo released the trigger and eased the hammer of his pistol. "Fucking…goddamned demon mother-fuckers…" _

Sanzo's eye twitched for what had to be the fiftieth time that day as he remembered the incident at the stream. He sat in the front passenger side of the Jeep, and looked in the rear-view mirror. Goku was napping, and for once, Gojyo had his head in her lap, the snoozing young man smiling contentedly in his sleep while Gojyo combed fingers through his wild brown hair. Red eyes watched the horizon, filled with an unknowable emotion.

Their group had changed, all because of one detail. Biology was a strange thing, it seemed. Because of something that one of their number could not control, they were thrown into a new mold of chaos. Sanzo's nerves were wearing thin. The next town they were headed toward had a temple. Sanzo thought a talk with the Three Aspects might not go amiss. If for no other reason, he could explain why there was a monstrous charge on the credit card for women's clothing. He needed to meditate, or find something to calm himself down. Because every time he thought about how flustered and helpless Gojyo had been, he saw red. As annoying as it had been for Gojyo to be a _man_, it was frustrating beyond belief for Sanzo to deal with the female version.

He had to knock if he entered a room where she was, or he got an earful from Hakkai, and a very odd, half-mortified look from Gojyo. The time they'd shared a room, Sanzo had tried to get into the bathroom while Gojyo was in there, but found it locked. It was just hard to get used to.

And then there had been the absolutely _sick_ joke the woman had made.

_Unless you're offering…_

As if he would consider that. Ever. But at least he'd set her straight on that account. And how to defend herself. Why had she felt the need to even suggest such a thing? Well, for one, she was probably just pushing his buttons like always. And now, there was this new leverage. He just couldn't make himself really open up on her and smack the fuck out of the kappa. _Damn it. _ It would appear that the gentleman in Genjyo Sanzo had chosen the very worst time to wake up and make himself known.

The Jeep came to a very abrupt halt, and Sanzo was nearly thrown over the windshield. "Hakkai, what the—"

"Sanzo Ikko! Prepare to meet your doom!" Sanzo groaned. He was _so_ not in the mood for killing flunkies.

Goku was already awake, and the boy and Gojyo stepped out of the back seat. When they came to stand before the baker's dozen of very weak-looking demons, the red-haired woman looked back at him, grinning. "Take it easy, old man. We'll handle them." The two kicked up sand as they moved, a whirlwind of movement and violence. Gojyo somehow seemed more graceful than before, her body flowing from one movement to another as the shakujou only did a fraction of the work it used to. Somehow, the woman killed four more demons than Goku had. The boy frowned as the last of them blew away as dry dust.

"Were you holding out on me, you stupid sprite?" the monkey whined, "You better not hold back again, or I'll do worse than knock you out."

As their weapons disappeared and they got back into the jeep, she grabbed the boy and locked his head under her arm. "You should learn how to respect your elders," she growled amiably, grinding her knuckles into his scalp and listening to him squawk. When she released him, he was rubbing his head. Settled back into their seats, Gojyo smiled and sighed. "But no, I won't hold back." Goku's smile was almost radiant. It was obvious that he had a soft spot for his fighting with the kappa, but it had taken a different kind of turn.

"Good." The boy laughed, gently pushing at her shoulder before laying his head in her lap again.

"Brat, I've spoilt you already?" Gojyo asked, raising one eyebrow and scratching at the young man's head.

Nodding, Goku closed his eyes and said cheekily, "Yep. Can't get rid of me now." The only one that didn't laugh at that comment was Sanzo, whose eye twitched again.

* * *

**A/N: ** Hurray for spoiled brats. I loved the idea that Gojyo would warm up to the monkey boy after becoming a woman. And I like to play with men's hair, so I figure it's a pretty girly-like thing to do. The transition to hormonal femininity is only beginning, so there might be a new witch to watch out for…


	3. Part III: Stormy Blues

**A/N: **Hi everyone. This chapter begins the spiral downward into annoyed attraction. And what a spiral it is. Liquor, poker, blackjack, and secrets…and maybe a little bit more. The title of the chapter is, of course, a song, just like before. Stormy is pretty much the way I look at Gojyo and Sanzo's relationship at this point. The blackjack game was actually played out on my living room floor, and I'm not sure that I shuffled my cards well enough. Please excuse my lack of understanding where poker is concerned. I never could play that game. Oh. And there is a very good reason why Genjyo Sanzo should never drink Bourbon whiskey.

Inspirational Music: "Stormy Blues", as performed by Billie Holiday.

* * *

**Part III:** Stormy Blues

Huffing loudly, Goku shifted in his chair. "Aw…" he groaned, "…why can't I go?" He had been listening to the others talking, and honestly, he couldn't figure out what was so bad about going to a tavern, or why he wasn't allowed. Hakkai shot him an amused, though admittedly rather scandalized look, while Gojyo snorted. Then, he had to duck the harisen as it came flying out of nowhere. The resident holy man was towering over him, twitching with irritation. "Sanzo…I never get to do anything! I'm a grown man, you know!"

The monk glared hard at him. "You are a child in every respect other than the way you eat and fight, Goku." One of the older man's eyebrows was drawn upward, while the other was scrunched down over his violet stare. Goku relented, but he was still annoyed. He crossed his arms over his chest, pouting. Who wanted to go to a rotten tavern, anyhow?

"We're coming right back, Goku. All we're going out for is to get the sake." Hakkai said this in a calm tone, and he thought that it was just to make him feel better. He must have been looking dejected, because Gojyo ruffled his hair and said she'd find something that tasted like bananas for him. Hakkai balked. "I don't know that it would be such a good idea to give Goku alcohol, if that's all right."

Sanzo nodded. "We don't need to find out what it's like to deal with a drunken monkey, Gojyo."

An annoyed noise came from the redhead. "Would a _virgin_ banana daiquiri be allowable, o virtuous and pure Sanzo?" Goku's eyes widened as the sarcastic insult sank into its target. The smell of gun oil wafted in Goku's nose for an instant before the metallic click of Sanzo's gun sounded loudly in the room. Gojyo leaned a hip on the table lazily, calmly facing the barrel of the cocked and loaded weapon. A smile twitched at her lips as she asked, "Would you like anything, Sanzo? I could see if they have any Bourbon. I think you'd like it."

Goku was getting antsy. It was like the fight was already under way, but no punches were being thrown. They were fighting with words and looks, and it was hard for him to understand. Hakkai was slowly edging away from them, which only made the youngest member of the group believe that he was right. Sanzo wasn't going to shoot her, Goku was pretty sure. But, it looked like Gojyo was going to push as far as possible without actually making him pull the trigger, and it was working, as far as Goku could tell.

"Whatever," Sanzo grunted, putting his pistol away while growling unintelligibly under his breath. Gojyo laughed quietly and left with Hakkai to get sake and apparently, Bourbon, as well. But what the hell about bananas…he didn't even _like_ bananas.

* * *

Hakkai watched curiously as Gojyo ordered the jug of sake and a bottle of Bourbon (they didn't have banana daiquiris). Seemingly oblivious to the attention that was being given to the languid way she was standing, the red-haired woman leaned on the bar and waited while the bar tender prepared her order. There were several men that looked as if they were about to approach the bar, no doubt to buy Gojyo a drink. The novelty of having the world's greatest womanizer see how the other half lives was only beginning, and Hakkai was taking a measure of rather sadistic pleasure in watching it unfold.

A tall man with broad shoulders and dark brown hair slid up next to Gojyo on her right. "Barkeep, get the lady a double of whatever she's drinking. On me." The turn of Gojyo's head was slow, and the disgust was plainly visible in those red eyes.

"Beat it," she spat, and turned back to waiting for the man behind the bar to finish sealing the jug of sake.

Hakkai nearly moved to intervene when a large hand gripped at Gojyo's upper arm. "I don't think that's very nice missy." His face was becoming pinched as his anger became visible at the rejection, his face reddening somewhat. "A man offers to buy you a drink, you should accept gratefully." The only reason why Hakkai did not step in to (and he would wonder about why he even considered _trying_ later) defend the lady's honor was because her slender hand had shot out to grasp a very private area of the man's anatomy and began squeezing. Was that a twist?

Grinning and keeping her voice sweet, Gojyo said, "I'm sorry. I've never been very lady-like. Now…I _think_ that I said I wasn't interested…" The man's eyes were watering by this point, and he nodded vehemently before she released him. Hakkai watched in sympathy as the man limped away. Shortly thereafter, with their purchases in hand, they were on their way out of the bar. Turning to Hakkai, Gojyo asked, "Please tell me that I never acted like that…"

The former teacher smiled, shifting the jug of sake in his arms. "No. You were a bit worse." The hand not holding a bottle of Bourbon slapped at her face. "Don't worry, Gojyo. You handled that a lot better than I thought you would." Her questioning look was met with a grin. "I thought you were going to slap him."

"Fuck you, Hakkai," she growled, and stalked quickly off in the direction of the inn, popping and lighting a cigarette with one hand. It never ceased to amaze Hakkai how Gojyo could make smoking an artful addiction. His friend was filled with surprises, it seemed. Following a bit more slowly to give the grumbling woman space, he laughed quietly to himself. This was cheap entertainment for his sadistic side. Novel, indeed.

* * *

Sanzo leaned back in his chair, eyeing the cards he held. Sipping at the Bourbon in the glass he held, he considered. Gojyo had just seen his bet, and raised by twenty, but Hakkai was looking at his hand with an expression of contemplation. The brunette's poker face was better than anyone else's he knew, so Sanzo wasn't about to rule out the fact that he could be pretending to have a bad hand. Goku threw his cards down, claiming to have no luck with the game.

The fiery, but somehow sweet taste of whiskey seemed to soak into his tongue. It was a new feeling, but not unpleasant. Eyes flicking over to watch the other players' body language, he gauged the possibility of bluffing. He could almost never tell with the kappa was bluffing, but that was because before their journey, Gojyo made a living at being a gambler. "Call," came Hakkai's amiable voice, made more so by the sake he'd consumed.

Sanzo lay down his cards. "Pair of ladies."

Hakkai made a face, but shrugged slightly. "I've got a pair of tens…"

Gojyo, across the table from Sanzo, tilted her chair back, balancing on the rear legs and dropped a full house onto the table. "Read 'em and weep, gentlemen." Goku yelled something about cheating, and Hakkai raised an eyebrow. That was the third hand out of the last seven that the kappa had won. Usually, the dark-haired demon slayer won two out of three hands. This time, Hakkai had won the other four, but those games always seemed to go faster than the ones Gojyo won, and the pots were larger when the redhead took them. Sanzo just lit another cigarette, watching through the blue-gray smoke as Gojyo raked in the money on the table. She was grinning like the cat that ate the prized canary.

Hakkai put the lid back on the sake jug. "I've played enough, I think." When he left the room, Goku gave a large yawn and said he was going to go and see if Hakkai wanted to teach him any math. According to him, that was the best way to make him fall asleep. For some reason, Sanzo did not doubt it. There were certain things that the monkey could handle, but higher math seemed to bore him to tears.

The door shut behind their companions, leaving a smirking Gojyo and a scowling Sanzo. "Care to play again, Mr. Monk?" A shake of blonde hair had that smirk widening into an evil smile. "What? Afraid you'll lose your shirt?" Gojyo grabbed the cards and began shuffling.

"Not interested, kappa." He said, taking a long drag on his cigarette. Why did every word that came out of her mouth seem to be a piece of bait? A month earlier, when Gojyo had been a man, he could handle it. All he had to do was yell, pull his gun and threaten. But now, everything was subtle. The insults weren't open, therefore the retaliatory action couldn't be. So he ended up setting the harisen aside for cutting remarks that required more thought than his old blustering over how many women Gojyo slept with. However he decided to counter-attack, most often, he had become passive-aggressive. They'd only had three real blow-ups, and that was only when he couldn't stand the build-up any more. Showing just how much of a woman Gojyo was turning into, she seemed to find it infinitely more entertaining to watch Sanzo stew in his annoyance, that infuriating smirk plastered over her face.

Sanzo watched Gojyo give him a sidelong glance. Her eyes narrowed in a way that said she didn't believe him. "Drink your damned Bourbon, priest. I'm going change for bed. Cut the cards while I'm in the bathroom, will ya?" She left her jacket hanging on the back of the chair, and grabbed her bag on the way to the bathroom door. He let out a long, annoyed breath. It was a good thing they were going to be in this town for a few days to resupply; the Bourbon was a lot stronger than the sake, and he was going to have one hell of a hangover in the morning, but he couldn't quit drinking it. Now that he thought about it, he was not quite sure why.

Five minutes later, Gojyo emerged from the bathroom, wearing her usual nightwear: a white tank-top and an old pair of boxer shorts. These were leftovers from her men's clothing. Apparently, there were still some things that she wasn't able to let go of. Once her things were tossed at the foot of her bed, she eyed him for a moment. "How's the Bourbon?"

"Fine," he mused, waiting for the insult that was sure to come. It didn't. Instead, Gojyo turned her chair around, straddling the chair-back. Her chest pressed against the wood, and the woman shifted to make herself more comfortable before she picked up the still uncut deck of cards. She cut the deck, shuffled one more time, and dealt him two cards: one face up, the other down.

"Blackjack."

Sanzo's cigarette got snuffed, and Gojyo lit one. "What're we betting?" he asked.

She shrugged. "Just a friendly game. I think I've taken enough of your money."

A friendly game. Since when had they been friendly? Brushing the comment aside, he filled his glass again before offering the bottle to the red-eyed woman. She took it, and poured a healthy amount into her own glass before she took a sip. An almost dreamy smile came over her face as the liquor went down, and it was clear that good memories were connected with this particular beverage. Before he could make a snide remark about that, the cards were dealt to the dealer.

Sanzo's visible card was the Eight of Hearts, while Gojyo's was the Jack of Clubs. He lifted the bottom card. The Queen of Hearts made eighteen. "I'll stay." Gojyo looked at her cards, smiled, and then flipped over the Ace of Hearts. With twenty-one, the dealer won. Sanzo's eye twitched. "Deal again." The cards were cleared away, and a new hand dealt, with Sanzo showing the Ace of Spades and Gojyo the Three of the same suit. Sanzo only had the Two of Hearts to work with. "Hit me." He was dealt the Five of Spades, and Gojyo took the Ten. Wondering at the suit distribution, Sanzo stayed at seventeen. When the cards were shown, the kappa had twenty-three.

"Fuck. Dealer busts." She pulled heavily on her cigarette, and dealt again, letting smoke drift from her lips aimlessly. Sanzo stayed at eighteen, but Gojyo couldn't resist taking two more cards and going bust at twenty-two. Risk-taking was a trait that was more suited to poker than blackjack, and this was becoming painfully apparent as he watched the frown developing between those slender eyebrows. Emptying her glass in one gulp, she poured another and dealt yet another hand. "Okay." She leaned heavily on the table before they looked at their cards. "I don't wanna play for money. How about we play for information?"

"Information?" He asked, intrigued, but slightly wary. Male or female, this _was_ Sha Gojyo, an individual that was not to be trusted further than a tight leash allowed.

"Yeah," Gojyo said slowly, "I win, you gotta answer any question. If you win, I'll tell you whatever you want." Now, this was either going to be very entertaining, or dangerous. On the one hand, it was a way to get inside that stupid, perverted head, but on the other, it could blow up in Sanzo's face. He agreed to it only because he was past the point of caring. Bourbon made his judgment fly right out of the window, he decided, but as previously stated, he couldn't make himself care.

Gojyo stayed on her first two cards, showing the Jack of Diamonds. Sanzo only had sixteen, and thought to at least tie with what she had in hand, but he busted when he got a second King, landing him at twenty-six. Gojyo snorted. "And I only had seventeen…okay. What I wanna know," a long swig of Bourbon went down with ease, "is…why do you keep the monkey around?"

Well. That was a far more innocent question than he had been expecting. But it wasn't easily answered. "I don't do it willingly…at least not completely." One of Gojyo's eyebrows rose inquisitively as she dealt again. Sanzo frowned, looking at his cards but not really paying much attention. "I can't get rid of him. He's…he's like my little brother, I guess. Or the dog that I can't make leave me alone." Tapping his cards, he motioned for another.

She nodded slowly, and set an Ace atop his Four and the Nine of Hearts. Fifteen. He could feel bust coming, and the conversation was starting to make him a little uncomfortable, but he took the obligatory hit, getting the Two of Spades. Gojyo took the Four of Hearts, and stayed distractedly. She won by one point, and Sanzo was forced to answer another question. He took another drink to steady himself.

"Do you really want to kill me, or is it just anger talking?" There was a kind of sly tilt to her head. What was she up to?

His response came out a bit too quickly, and sounded automatic, even to him. "What do you mean _do I really want to kill you_? Of course I do. We just happen to be on the same side." More cards were dealt, and he refused to look at Gojyo. Sanzo stayed at seventeen, and Gojyo took two cards for twenty. Damned Aces…Sanzo had to answer another question!

That sly look came over her face again, and a Cheshire-cat grin unfurled over her mouth around the rim of her glass. "So…" Her voice was slow, showing the amount of alcohol she'd consumed. Gojyo was more than tipsy. "…does Genjyo Sanzo masturbate?" Sanzo sprayed Bourbon across the table, and then wiped his mouth while goggling at the woman, who was still grinning at him in spite of being covered in a fine spray of whiskey. "Well? Spill it."

His shock persisted, but the alcohol in his system made his mouth move of its own volition as he gripped the edge of the table and stared at the beads of amber liquid clinging to the rim of his glass. "Fuck…why do you want to know?" On second thought, he wasn't sure he wanted to hear the answer to that.

"I'll answer that if you win the next hand, Sanzo. Now. Tell me."

That twitch started under his eye. Quivering with suppressed annoyance, he growled, "Yes." Gojyo's small whoop of triumph frightened him a little, and he leaned away, eyes widening. "Damn it…I'm human, aren't I?" Cards hit the table, and Gojyo smiled, the way her mouth spread causing her scars to stretch oddly and answered him in a quieter tone.

"It would appear that you are." Sanzo took two cards and stayed at sixteen. Gojyo also took three, and winced as she busted at twenty-five. "Fire away, high priest."

Sanzo took a long moment to think about what he would ask, but how hard could you think if you've been guzzling sake and whiskey all night? Fuck, his entire head felt like there was a fog settled over it. Wanting to be petty and get revenge for that last embarrassing question, he asked, "How many women have you slept with?"

Blood-colored eyebrows tried to climb into Gojyo's hairline. "You want pointers or something?"

Snorting, Sanzo waved his hand. "As if. Just answer the question."

A perplexed frown etched itself over her face, and she remained silent for close to five minutes. Finally, when Sanzo was about to pull the harisen and slap the side of her head, she said slowly, "I think…somewhere in the neighborhood of a hundred and fifty. I didn't keep a tally…" Now, it was Sanzo's turn to look surprised. Gojyo noticed the expression of disbelief, and she leaned across the table, a challenging smirk leveled at him. "I'd be happy to give you tips. Seeing as I can't indulge anymore, I guess _somebody_ ought to be getting laid around here."

That gave him pause. It must have been almost a month now…and still, Gojyo stayed as close to them as possible. She didn't go out alone, and there was no sign of her old perverted tendencies. "So…you're not going to try and find girls that might be into…girls?" His thoughts were spewing out of his mouth before they could be filtered. Damned Bourbon.

Gojyo snorted. "Hell no! Do you know how hard it is to find a decent-looking lesbian?" That drew a genuine laugh from Sanzo, and Gojyo blinked at him in surprise. "Did you just…_laugh_?"

Frowning, he said mockingly, "Yes. I _do_ laugh occasionally."

"I've never heard you laugh…not like that." Her voice had taken on a sulky tone that—and he thought he might be going insane—made her seem almost cute.

The next words out of his mouth sounded mocking, but he had to wonder at them once they'd been said. "That's because you never said anything funny before." Wait. Hold the phone and stop the presses…had he just given Sha Gojyo a compliment? Oh, it was time to get a razor and slit his fucking wrists. It seemed to surprise her, too, but she didn't say anything on the subject.

"You want another hand, or what?" The way she wasn't looking at him, and the way her hands fidgeted with the cards…Gojyo was nervous. Sanzo shook his head, declining the offer. "Hm. What now?"

Sanzo drained his glass and stood. Pulling off his robes and stripping to his underwear as he readied himself for bed, he asked, "What does it feel like?" He grabbed his glass off of the table and took the bottle, as well, padding over to his narrow bed. Once he'd seated himself on top of the blankets, he poured another glass while fixing Gojyo with his hazy amethyst-colored eyes. Being rather distracted threw his aim off a little, causing him to spill some of the whiskey onto his fingers.

* * *

It took a long couple of moments before that question actually sank in. She furrowed her brows, watching the blonde man lick the Bourbon off of his fingers. There was a little of the stuff between the index and middle fingers on Sanzo's right hand, and Gojyo found herself almost mesmerized by the way the priest's tongue slid out, his lips sucking at the knuckle of his index finger. Shaking off that train of thought, she blinked, "Beg pardon…what does _what_ feel like?"

She shoved off of her chair, picking up her glass and holding it out to him for a refill. With a raised eyebrow, Sanzo clarified as he poured. "What does it feel like to be a woman? Is it different from being a man?" The priest reclined on the pillows at the head of the bed and waited for an answer. Gojyo dropped onto the foot of Sanzo's bed, and thought hard about that. Did it really feel that different? Digging her toes into the blanket, her knees pulled up to her chest, she nibbled at the rim of her glass before taking a sip.

The burn of the Bourbon tried to take her back to a time not that long ago, but she refused to let it. That was not something she wanted to think of. "Well," she began, "physically, there are the obvious differences. Carrying these around isn't the most fun…" Gojyo pointed at her breasts, which stretched the cotton of her shirt, "and it feels funny…not having some _other_ things. But the bitch of it is the fucking mood swings. It's like I want to bite someone's head off one minute, and then the goddamned hormones kick in, and I'm depressed." Taking another sip from her glass, she slumped against the wall. This conversation was weird. Why did Sanzo want to know this shit anyway?

The monk snorted, sitting up and scratching at his bare chest. "You _have_ been a moody bitch…"

Gojyo's back stiffened and her eyes narrowed at him dangerously. "Excuse me? You're calling _me_ a bitch?" Her head swiveled to look at Sanzo, who was regarding her with even droopier eyes than usual. "God, you're a hypocrite!" What right did this bastard have to say a word against anyone else? He blinked slowly and one of his blonde eyebrows twitched upward. _Fucking cool, calm, collected mother-fucker! _She was blustering in her own head. Was that a good sign? "If you ever get that stick out of your ass, and stop acting like a prissy little shit-brick, then _maybe_ I'll let you call me a bitch, but not before that, Sanzo."

The monk threw back his Bourbon, and dropped his glass onto the floor. "You just proved my point." He wasn't even looking at her. Gojyo felt like she was being ignored. It took all she had not to grab a handful of his hair and just smack his head against the wall. Sanzo twisted the cap off of the bottle of Bourbon, swirling the contents around before tipping it and taking a long drink. The gaze he fixed her with when he lowered the bottle was unsteady, but had a hint of mocking in it. "It must be terrible for you," he said, "to be…like you are." Leaning forward, his arm brushed against her leg. "I mean…you haven't gone out whoring in a while, have you? It must be _killing_ you."

The rage that boiled to the surface of Gojyo's mind was so hot and frightening that she wasn't sure why it was there. Sanzo had been calling her any number of names for as long as they'd known each other. But this…this was different. It _felt_ different. There was this kind of pain that it produced, right in the middle of her chest. "What…did you just call me a whore?"

Sanzo blinked slowly at Gojyo, eyes looking a little unfocused as he plowed on, oblivious to the fire building inside the woman before him. "Well…you said it yourself. You fucked over a hundred women."

"Fuck _this_," she growled, and stood so suddenly that the displacement of her weight nearly made Sanzo roll to the side. "I'm _not_ having this conversation with you." She turned to walk across the room to the other bed, but didn't get far. A hand grabbed hers. Looking over her shoulder, she saw those hazy purple eyes peering up at her. "What?"

"I…" Sanzo's voice trailed off. Gojyo pulled her hand away from him, and his eyes stared at his hand. What was wrong with him? He'd been drunk plenty of times, and never acted like this. She turned away again, and walked away, ignoring him. Sanzo was piss-ass drunk, obviously in a bizarre mood, and Gojyo didn't want to be anywhere near him. A hard shove in the back sent her flailing to the floor, and she caught herself just before her face got smashed on the wooden planks. Sanzo was on her in an instant, turning her over and settling all of his weight onto her hips as he sat on her. "Don't walk away from me."

The anger that had bubbled up before exploded then, coming out of her mouth in a stream of expletives and insults. "I'll fucking walk away from you if I feel like it, you frigid asshole! What the shit do you _want_ from me? I answered your goddamned questions, just like you answered mine. Now you want to dredge up the past? I'm not a fucking slut anymore. I don't even goddamned well masturbate…For fuck's sake, I can't even look at myself in a mirror! Now get the hell off of me before I _do_ bite your dick off!" Her hands came up to shove at his chest, but he caught them easily and pushed them down, pinning them to the floor on either side of her head.

He was now bending over her, his breath hot on her face, the whiskey smell sending a dizzy feeling through Gojyo's stomach. Adrenaline was starting to pump through her body; her heart beat faster and breathing sped. "I have one more question." Looking up at him just then was difficult. Sanzo's hair was hanging down around his face, the way it clung to the perspiration on his cheeks doing strange things to Gojyo's mind.

"Get off of me," she whispered hoarsely, trying to muster every bit of sanity she could. It wasn't working. Those dark, hazy violet eyes just bored into hers, holding her still. All she could do was turn her head to the side, looking away. That was a mistake. Hot breath gusted against her neck now, and a strangled sound escaped her throat against her will. Sanzo's legs slid against Gojyo's as he settled his body atop hers. Her mind locked up in panic when she felt the unmistakable hardness of an erection pressed against her lower abdomen.

Hair tickled the skin of her neck when his head dipped lower, growling low and almost threateningly in Gojyo's ear, "What if I were offering?" It felt like someone dropped a block of ice into her stomach. _Oh, merciful Goddess, please tell me this isn't real… _Lips trailed over the shell of her ear, and a gasp squeezed itself out of her lips. "Would you take me up on that…Gojyo?" _Fuck, fuck, fuckety fuck-fuck…_ For some reason, all she could think was a long string of curses for letting herself get pinned to the ground by a drunk, deranged, and apparently horny priest. Trying to struggle did no good. His weight was in exactly the right places.

All she could say was, "Why?"

"Why not?" Teeth started nipping at the tendons of Gojyo's neck, and she couldn't lie and say it was only adrenaline now. Groaning, her eyes slid shut. Damned priest…it felt…good. "Hn…you like that?" His tongue curled and slid over sensitive skin, as if it already knew exactly how to drive her instantly mad, leaving Gojyo gasping for air and squirming to be set free. Vaguely, there was a part of Gojyo's mind that was wondering why Sanzo knew how to locate erogenous areas. "You taste like…" another long lick went from her collarbone up to her ear, which he bit lightly, "…mmm…you taste like Bourbon and sugar."

Gojyo couldn't move, almost couldn't breathe. And a strange hot tingling was spreading through an area that no other sensation had previously occurred, making it all that much more confusing. Hearing was nullified in favor of her body boosting its sense of touch. She felt helpless, abandoned by the strength that she'd come to trust. Memories flooded like poisoned waters through her mind, of nights alone and dreams that her male self had forbidden any thought of. Fantasy, dream, reality and a pair of darkened violet eyes seized at every fiber of her being, floating through her consciousness on waves of need that broke against the feeble self-control that was fast wearing away. Then, suddenly, through the haze of alien sensations that Gojyo could now identify as arousal, one thought rose: _Not like this_.

Her voice came out much clearer now, her resolution hardened. "I'm warning you, Sanzo. Get _off_ of me, or you're going to regret it."

Breathing hotly against her neck, Sanzo laughed. "But you didn't answer my question," he purred, that voice sending a wave of heat through Gojyo's already tortured body.

Jerking her head back toward him, she glared up at the priest, who pulled back to look into her eyes. "You…you think that just because I had an open mind about the ladies, I'll fuck _you_ now? Just like that?"

Sanzo's face dipped lower, and Gojyo could feel the phantom tickle that always came over the skin of one's lips before a kiss. "Something like that," the blonde breathed, his tongue flicking out to wet her lips. If anything like this had occurred a month ago, Sanzo would be overpowered by superior strength and beaten within an inch of his life. While Gojyo was not so strong in this body as she had been as a man, she could still go with the one thing that worked best when dealing with this pompous, arrogant, self-righteous bastard. She fought dirty.

"Think again," she snarled, snapping her head upward and smashing her forehead against Sanzo's. The crack of flesh and bone sounded through the room, and the priest flopped off of her heavily, rolling to one side and groaning. Jumping to her feet, Gojyo glared hatefully down at Sanzo. The only way she could think of to describe the feeling that seethed through her mind was simply to call it womanly indignation. Later on, she could probably think of another word. Leaning down at him as he clapped a hand to his forehead and gaped up at her in total disbelief, Gojyo spat, "If you want a whore, go to a brothel. I'm not fucking _anybody_." With that, she grabbed her bag, boots, and jacket, and was out of the door.

* * *

A pounding at the door woke Hakkai out of the early stages of sleep. He sat bolt upright in his bed, blinking in the near-dark. Goku groaned and sat up as well. "Hakkai…what's going on?" The younger man asked, and threw the covers off of himself.

Frowning, Hakkai shook his head and said, "I don't know. Just be ready for anything." Cautiously, he tiptoed to the door, and listened. No sound came until the person on the other side of the door began pounding again. When he opened the wooden partition tentatively, he found Gojyo standing in the hallway, all of her worldly belongings in her arms and a look of utter rage in her eyes. Before Hakkai could speak, she kicked the door open completely and strode in, leaving the brunette speechless and gaping like a carp.

When the kappa dropped her things on the little table, she leaned heavily on her hands, which were pressed into the wooden surface of that same piece of furniture. "Hakkai, I'm not rooming with him. We're switching."

Unable to comprehend what was going on, Hakkai stared for a moment and then said, "But—"

The growl in Gojyo's voice was so deep that Hakkai was not quite sure how he understood her when she said, "No questions. I'm not rooming with that asshole." Her chest was heaving, and it was obvious from the way she still leaned on the table that if it weren't there, her legs would give out underneath her. In all of the years he'd known Sha Gojyo, he had never seen his friend so angry. No argument, fight, or other situation had ever come close, except for when he'd stopped a gang of demons from raping a woman…and then it clicked in Hakkai's head. His eyes widened as he took in her lowered head, hair hanging down over her eyes, and then, the drops of moisture on the oak table-top that gleamed in the light from the hallway that spilled in from the door.

"Okay," He said quietly, "I'll go."

* * *

Goku watched in horrified fascination as Hakkai collected his things and left. What had just happened? Then, as soon as the door closed, Gojyo collapsed into the nearest chair and lay her head on the table. Swallowing hard, he slid out of his bed and turned on the lamp on the nightstand. Now, he could see that Gojyo's shoulders were shaking. Her hands slithered up over the back of her head, gripping handfuls of crimson hair almost tight enough to pull it out.

The young man reached out a hand, placing it gently in the middle of her back. "H…Hey, Gojyo…"

Voice hoarse and gravelly, she said without lifting her head, "Yeah?" Now, Goku was surprised. She was crying. What…what could he do? He had never had to deal with a crying girl before. And it was even weirder in this particular case…because it was Gojyo. He thought for a minute. What would Hakkai do? Hakkai was so good at dealing with these things. When Goku had cried once, he remembered that Hakkai rubbed his back.

Mimicking that motion, he said, "Um…are you…you know…are you okay?"

A loud snorting sniffle later, he was staring into blood-red eyes that looked more angry than sad. What happened? Did Sanzo say something mean? But that didn't make any sense. Sanzo said mean things to Gojyo all the time, and she never cried. He watched her swallow down the lump that had formed in her throat from crying, and then she said, "Hey…monkey?" Goku tilted his head to one side and made an inquisitive noise. One of the woman's hands rose, reaching up to ruffle his hair. "You're a good kid…don't change…okay?"

Goku blinked at her in confusion. He smiled a little, and grabbed a tissue from the box on the table. "Here."

A slightly trembling hand took the offered tissue, and Gojyo laughed weakly. "Ah, fuck. I hate being a woman! Look at me…I'm a mess, aren't I?" Wiping at her eyes and the wet trails that stained her face, she looked away from him, and Goku felt the bottom of Gojyo's hair brush his fingers as he tried to rub at her back soothingly. It was soft, her hair. He could remember a time when he'd thought that because it was red, it would be hot, and that almost made him laugh in spite of the situation. Without really thinking too much about it, Goku ran his fingers upward, stroking at hair that was not hot, but not cool, either. It was normal hair, just like his. After a couple of minutes, she wasn't shaking anymore, then a moment or two after that, Gojyo leaned against his chest.

"Hey, Gojyo?" he asked tentatively, hoping she wouldn't get mad at him for speaking. A grunt that sounded something like 'huh' came out of her, and he said, "You want some water?"

* * *

Sanzo was still reeling from a wicked blow to the head when he saw the door open. Hakkai stood framed by the yellow light from the hallway, looking rather ominous. The chi-manipulator calmly entered the room, closed the door and set his things down on the now-vacant bed. He watched as the brunette pushed in the chairs at the table, stacked the cards, and collected glasses and the bottle of Bourbon (empty, now), arranging them neatly in the center of the oak surface. From his sprawled position on the floor, he saw the extremely serene set of Hakkai's features, which he had only seen a few times before.

He wasn't sure what the odd feeling he was getting in his stomach was. It was a tension, like expectation mixed with fear. Hakkai then moved to the bed he would now apparently occupy, and pulled a pair of jeans, shoes, and a t-shirt from his bag and put them on. Why was he getting dressed? Blinking at the man who had not yet even deigned to look at Sanzo, that fear in his stomach suddenly grew. Hakkai wasn't even wearing his monocle, but he was now tying his shoes. Slender fingers grasped a handful of white fabric. Gathering Sanzo's robes in his hands, Hakkai held them out to him.

Green eyes met his violet, and Sanzo shivered. There it was…cold, naked…rage. "Put them on." His eyes casting about for his gun, he swallowed hard when Hakkai held the weapon in his right hand, cocking the hammer and leveling it straight at his face. "Now."

No amount of alcohol fumes could cloud the meaning behind that gesture. If Genjyo Sanzo did not comply with the command given him, his life would be forfeit. And from the look in Hakkai's eyes, he had little—if any—compunction at the moment. So he got shakily to his feet, numbly dressing himself, toed on his sandals, and standing for a moment staring into those enraged verdant eyes before he felt a hand gripping his neck like a steel trap, and cold metal pressed against the underside of his chin.

"We're going to take a little walk." Hakkai said calmly, almost sweetly.

* * *

**A/N: **Oh…I think it would be safe to say that the shit is about to hit the proverbial fan, what do you think?


	4. Part IV: Between the Devil and

**A/N: **Hehe. You guys seemed to like the last chapter a lot. I'm really glad. It was fun to write. Do you know, researching body positions is difficult! That whole thing with the head-butting was interesting, since I didn't have any help. This chapter is a bit different. It's very introspective, so you get a lot of Sanzo and Gojyo's reactions to the previous night. And then, we have the Merciful Goddess's commentary, as well. Sanzo doesn't like her much. But anyhow. The chapter title was chosen because of the first line of the song: "I don't want you, but I'd hate to lose you", which I tried to make the theme of the chapter. It's really just another way to say that "I'm in denial, but I really want you."

Inspirational Music: "Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea", as performed by Ella Fitzgerald.

**Warning:**

**Li--**Lime-ishness (for voyeuristic bathtub scene)

* * *

**Part IV: **Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea 

A deafening crash echoed throughout the temple, waking six monks, the abbot, and five acolytes. They all rushed out to the entrance gate, which they gaped at. The entire thing had been shattered, and lay in splinters upon the ground. The smell of ozone and the fading electricity of chi were hanging in the air. Walking through the settling dust, crunching over splinters of six-hundred-year-old wood, and aged bronze studs was a Sanzo priest, who was apparently being held captive by a deranged man with a gun. This man spoke calmly to the abbot.

"Please pardon the intrusion, but knocking did no good, and Sanzo-sama has a desperate need to speak with his superiors, _don't you_, Sanzo-sama?" The smile on the dark-haired man's face chilled the abbot's heart, and he could barely suppress the shiver that threatened to course through him. The Sanzo priest nodded, a bit jerkily. "You should all go back to bed," the man with the gun said quietly, and the abbot thought it best to follow his instructions. There was something about this man that gave him a very bad feeling.

* * *

Sanzo tried to remain calm as Hakkai frog-marched him through the corridors of the temple, to the inner sanctum. Now standing in front of the large, iron-bound doors, Sanzo had a sense of dread building in his stomach that he had never experienced before. A hand clamped down on his right arm, turning him around. The dark-haired man's green eyes were alight with anger. Where he had been cold before, it now burned like the fires of Hell, which caused Sanzo to try backing away. His arm was caught in that vice-like grip, so there was no moving. Speaking through clenched teeth, Hakkai growled, "If you _ever_…ever hurt her again, Sanzo…I swear on the grave of my sister…there won't be anything left of you for the vultures to pick over." 

Suddenly, Sanzo had never felt more sober. He knew a threat when he heard one, and he could easily tell when one was hollow. That usual ring of untruth wasn't there. Hakkai really would kill him. Fear suffused his mind, and his mouth moved on its own. "I never meant to—" His words were cut off by a sharp pain in his stomach, which caused him to double over. When he looked up at Hakkai, whose fist was still clenched from punching him, he swallowed hard at the look of sadistic pleasure in the man's eyes, the tiny smile gracing his lips giving him a chill.

"No excuses, Sanzo." Hakkai used the gun's barrel—which he placed in the middle of Sanzo's chest—to push him upright and toward the door. "Now, go in and tell them what you did." Sanzo's shoulders tensed. His hands reached for the enormous iron handles, but stopped when Hakkai said, "If you hold _anything_ back, I'll know." The priest's eyes shut tightly, wishing that he could simply refuse, but knowing that this meeting was inevitable. He pushed at the doors, and walked in.

* * *

Light and sound woke Gojyo. The sun was streaming into the windows, much brighter than it normally was when Hakkai came to wake her. The sound she heard was the door being opened. Blinking and rubbing at her eyes to rid them of the crust from tears and sleep, she watched Goku enter the room, carrying a tray laden with more food than should be. A plate overflowed with roasted potatoes, peppers, and some kind of herbed glaze. There were stacks of toast, a pot of tea, scrambled eggs, and a big plate of bacon and sausage. She laughed a bit. "Morning," the monkey said, putting the tray on the table so that he could close the door. "I got a little of everything." 

"Looks like it. I don't even want to see the eyes you gave the cooks to get _that_…" She muttered this, but she knew the boy had heard. He could make the biggest, most pathetically adorable puppy-dog eyes in the world, and there were few that would not fall down on their knees and offer up any sacrifice to make those watering eyes stop. Gojyo could resist…most of the time. The other day, they had worked on her, but only because she was hormonal. And he started making those very same eyes at her as he approached the bed.

"Budge over," Goku whined when she didn't sit up. Rolling her eyes at him, she did as he asked. He sat down carefully, placing the tray between them. "This is actually lunch." Gojyo nodded slowly, nibbling at the toast in her hand. They'd let her sleep until midday? To be honest, she felt like she had needed it. When the monkey started shoveling scrambled eggs into his mouth, she stifled a laugh. He looked at her questioningly, but she just waved it off. He could be so…_Goku_ at times.

After she'd consumed a few potatoes, some toast, and a bit of bacon, Gojyo sat back and started sipping at her tea. Just when she was starting to feel better, Goku made a sound like a whine. He had this look on his face…like he was holding something in, barely able to contain himself. Resting the cup in her lap, she said in exasperation, with one eyebrow raised, "Out with it, kid."

Goku's face turned a shade of red usually only reserved for tomatoes. "S-sorry. But I was wondering…" He poked at the bacon on the platter, "…what did you and Sanzo fight about last night?" Oh. That. Gojyo studied the color of her tea, trying to think of how to answer the question. The younger man cleared his throat a little, and said, "B-because you were real upset. It was kinda scary. I don't think I ever saw you cry before…" Closing her eyes, Gojyo sighed. She reminded herself that he was only trying to look out for her, that she shouldn't snap at him and tell him that it was none of his damned business. Even though she really, really wanted to.

Her own feelings on the matter were very disjointed as it was, so how was she going to explain it to him? She had no clue how to deal with the situation, because it was unclear exactly what she felt about what had gone on between she and Sanzo. A dreadful thought occurred to her. What happened when she saw Sanzo again? Would he remember, or had he blacked out after drinking three fourths of a two-liter of Bourbon by himself? "Goku," she began, "there are some things…things that happened last night that I don't want to talk about. Is that okay?"

For a moment, the boy was silent. Then she felt him brush her hair away from her shoulder. "I guess…but if you need to, you can tell me. It doesn't matter…what it is." For the first time in a very _long_ time, Gojyo was glad for the monkey's childlike innocence. It was ironic how the kid she had always been sure was the last person she'd ever go to with her problems was the one person that she could trust implicitly. The one person that would never do anything to hurt her...was a monkey.

"Thanks, kiddo." Tossing the covers aside, she stood and put her cup on the table before turning back to the bed and bending down, placing a small peck on Goku's cheek. "I might take you up on that." Pretending not to see the faint pink color that dusted the young man's face, Gojyo picked up her bag and went to the bathroom to clean off the film of Bourbon and sweat and change.

* * *

It was long after dawn when Sanzo was allowed to leave the stone room where he had received severe and repeated tongue-lashings from all three talking heads, and that infernal…hermaphrodite. Their voices still rang in his now very hung-over head. As bad as the reproofs offered by those three had been, things had spiraled out of his control completely when Kanzeon Bosatsu showed up. Once she'd arrived, that damned goddess had seen fit to rip his excuses and explanations into shreds. 

_So you're telling me that you didn't try to jump our dear young lady's bones like some horny teenaged boy…_

She just kept on _pushing_ until he blew up in a fit of long-repressed anger. His eye twitched when he pushed past the outer doors of the temple, trying to block her words from his mind, but more so the things he himself had said. What he'd admitted. In a way, he did feel a little better, having gotten all of that bullshit off of his chest. What did it matter now? He was never going to do that again. _Ever_. None of it mattered. Not a bit. So what? So he'd said it out loud.

_One long, beautifully manicured nail poked the middle of his chest, and he looked down at it, glaring, before he turned that defiant purple gaze to the nail's owner. "Genjyo Sanzo…high priest of the Northern Lands…I should think that you had more self control." He rolled his eyes. "Are you trying deny to an omnipotent being that you have in the past, and do still desire, lust after, and altogether want Sha Gojyo?" _

A wry smile crossed his face as he remembered that. _What a bitch_…The doors opened, and Hakkai looked up at him from where he'd been seated on the ground. The dark-haired man's gaze was passive. It appeared that he had cooled down, somewhat. Sanzo almost walked past him, but stopped, holding out his hand. "My gun," he demanded, his tone coming out just as sour as he felt. The familiar, cold weight of it pressed into his palm, and he stashed it in the sleeve of his robes. When Hakkai tried to follow him, he looked back over his shoulder. "I am not in the mood for conversation. If you are bent on asking me what went on in there, then you'll have to wait. For a long, long time."

Sanzo started walking. He needed sleep. Gods did he need it. He was hung-over, but that was nothing compared to the massive knot on his forehead that had turned several shades of purple, red, and black. It seemed that becoming a woman had not made Gojyo's head any softer. But of course, he would not be allowed rest until he went to see her. The merciful goddess—he snorted at that title—had been very insistent about that. He was to go and see her…and apologize. The very thought sent a chill of cold dread through his body.

For one thing, it probably wasn't such a great idea that he even lay eyes on her. He might try to shoot her. A voice in his head, one that sounded oddly like that same annoyingly omnipotent goddess, piped up. _Are you sure you don't want to see her? She makes you crazy…doesn't she? _

Yes, Sha Gojyo had always made Sanzo crazy. Crazy with anger, crazy with annoyance. He'd always hated dealing with the perverted, stupid…_tall_ kappa. So when, in the years since they'd met had it turned into what it was? When had he started wanting to grab a handful of that hair and pull…not to hurt, but to stretch out that strangely elegant neck that his mouth might discover how it tasted? When had he begun yelling at the kappa for sleeping around because he hated himself for being jealous of those women?

His feet carried him more quickly than he would have liked to his destination. He looked up at the second story of the inn, wondering what Gojyo was doing. When Sanzo glanced around, Hakkai was nowhere to be found. Well, so much the better. Now…what about the monkey? The last thing he needed was for the idiot to hear him apologize to that woman. Gods…did he _have _to?

* * *

Gojyo sat on the little stool in the bathroom, listening to the water roaring out of the tap into the bathtub. Watching the water come out resembling a little waterfall did wonders for her nerves. She figured that she'd be a while, so a few minutes earlier, Gojyo had sent Goku out, to find Hakkai and make the man go over the last bit of math that they'd done. The kid needed to learn something other than the best way to cook chicken. 

Heaving a long sigh, she stood and cut off the water. It would be about waist deep, and she planned to sit in it for close to an hour. After stripping off the shirt and shorts she'd worn the previous night, Gojyo tossed them into the garbage. If she had any matches, she'd burn them. Maybe she wasn't quite as okay as she thought…But however the situation bothered her, it was difficult to stay angry when the room was filled with steam from the water. A little crack in the door let the cooler air in, but not quickly. Warmth and the water vapor worked into her body, soothing her, lulling her.

And when she slid into the big tub, Gojyo let out a long sigh of relief. Her mind began to wander as she picked up the soap and washcloth. It had been a very long time since thoughts about Genjyo Sanzo had so dominated her mind. Unlike the monk himself—whom she was convinced was in denial of being human at all—Gojyo had long since admitted that she found Sanzo attractive. Admittedly, it was at the time because she'd thought that the man was actually a woman…and who wouldn't? That hair, those eyes, and that _face_; Sanzo was a very beautiful man. Even after discovering the monk's masculinity, there was still a part of Gojyo's mind that looked at the blonde man appreciatively.

The thought of how he'd reacted to being called 'sweetheart' once nearly made Gojyo laugh. While Sanzo could admit that he was human (if pressed hard enough), it was too much to ask for him to even consider being attracted to _anyone_, let alone a man. So, Gojyo had left it alone. Six years later, look where it left her…breasts, hormones, and still in some measure pissed off at the world because he only thought of her as an annoyance.

But did he, really? Sanzo surely did not seem annoyed at two in the morning when he'd pinned her to the floor and started biting the fuck out of her neck. Oh, now _there_ was a dangerous thought, and one she seriously needed to block out of her head. If she knew Sanzo at all—and she did—he would pretend that nothing happened. He would get a bit bitchier than normal for about half a week, then go back to his old frustrating (and frustrat_ed_) self. But never would he say a damned word about what happened.

Gojyo wasn't sure how _she_ felt about it. Gods…it felt good when he was doing it, though. If it hadn't been for that one sudden moment of clarity, she was pretty sure that they'd have had an interesting morning. What would it be like…waking up next to him? That gave her a snort. _Demanding bastard…he'd probably hog the covers. _Yes, he probably would. She scrubbed at her arms, frowning at the bruises on her wrists. At the time, it didn't seem like he'd been holding her that tightly. That made her wonder.

Alcohol often made the true person come out. A furrow developed between her eyebrows, and the washcloth slipped from her hands, forgotten. If Sanzo had been gripping her so hard that he left bruises…how long had he wanted…no. It wasn't worth thinking about. But…she stared down at her wrists, the outline of Sanzo's thumbprints a brownish purple, and very clearly defined next to the imprint of his fingers. "Goddamnit…" Why did this have to happen _now_? Couldn't it have happened a year ago, when the truth could just have been beaten out of that stubborn monk?

* * *

Grumbling to himself, Sanzo looked into the mirror above the bathroom sink. The glass was cracked, and the silvering was wearing off in the corners, leaving black splotches where the room's reflection should be, but he saw his face perfectly. "Never again," he said resolutely, staring into his eyes in the mirror. No, there would not be a repeat of last night. Even if his body had wanted…_needed_ to be pressed so tightly against her. Even though his mouth wanted to taste that Bourbon-and-sugar addiction, and his fingers to hold more than just her wrists as he forced her to remain where she had been. 

And to think he'd always believed Gojyo had no self-control. But even if she didn't, he'd forced the situation. He'd held her down, used his weight to his advantage. And then, it was over. One blow to the head ended that little fantasy. It made him wonder…maybe seeing her right now wasn't such a good idea. He knew he wouldn't try to shoot her. The memory of they way her lips had tasted made sure of that. But he was dealing with a woman who could summon a wickedly sharp weapon out of thin air. Would she try to hurt him?

That's right…she _had_ wanted him. The sounds that came from her, and the way she had arched into his mouth…Gods, this was going to drive him mad. Delay was senseless now. He had to see her. It was the worst thing he could possibly do, but he _had_ to. Though, to say the truth, an apology was the last thing he wanted to give her. So he burst from the bathroom, tore off his robes, and slid into an old pair of jeans. "This is so stupid…"

Come to think of it, his IQ usually seemed a lot lower when he was dealing with Gojyo. Sanzo didn't bother with shoes. He just stalked down the hall, and opened the door without knocking. The room was empty, silent. Where the hell was she? A voice, muffled, came from the bathroom, "Goku? Is that you? I'm still in the tub, so don't come in, okay?" The thought of Gojyo in the bathtub tried to take over his mind, and he beat it into submission. Now was not the time to be having idle fantasies…though his body did not seem to mind them one bit. He seated himself in one of the chairs at the table to wait, closing his eyes and trying to find focus. It didn't help that the smell of soap and the dripping and swishing sounds of water were coming from the crack in the door.

The old exercise from his days studying with his old master worked, but only for a few minutes. A low groan from behind that door shattered his concentration, and his body moved on its own. He was on his feet, quietly walking to that tiny crack in the door and peeking inside, feeling shame rising in his guts, but not really caring just the same. Through a thick cloud of steam, he saw a large claw-foot tub, and its occupant leaning back against the sloping side. Gojyo's hair hung over the side of the tub, and her head was reclined, eyes closed. One leg rested on the tub's upper rim.

One slender hand held a washcloth, running lather over wet flesh. Sanzo tried to keep his breathing even, but when Gojyo's fingers replaced the cloth, smoothing over skin that not so long ago, he himself had tasted…it became increasingly difficult. A tiny sound escaped her lips, and he found himself mesmerized. Her fingers lingered over the large tendon that ran from her collarbone to just behind her ear, in exactly the way his mouth had done. His eyes widened. Was she thinking of what he had done to her? The washcloth fell into the water with a wet plop, and Sanzo watched in fascination as those pale, slender fingers began to hesitantly explore the rounded contours of perfectly formed breasts. A hiss echoed through the tiled room when gentle caresses found the sensitive flesh of a nipple.

Stifling his breathing by covering his mouth with his hand, Sanzo's face began to flame bright red. Gojyo's other hand had disappeared from view, but he had a decent idea of where it had gone, and the way the woman's back arched told him he was right. Little whimpers and quiet moans made their way to his ears, and the leg that had been propped on the edge of the tub now slid, shifting to hook around the porcelain ledge, muscles contracting, toes curling…

He swallowed hard, his free hand clenching into a fist so tight he knew he was going to bleed, Sanzo's eyes became fixed on the way Gojyo's features twisted, contorting into a mask of euphoria. His body was trying to betray him. There was a burning need developing somewhere in the neighborhood of his lower abdomen, and he was getting dizzy. Suddenly, and with a short, quiet cry, the crimson-haired woman's body jerked, and then became very still for a moment.

Sanzo couldn't move. He couldn't breathe. That sound…it rang in his ears, louder than a shout, to the point of excluding even the harsh pants of his own breathing. He stared in disbelief at the creature that leaned now limply against the tub's surface. Her very skin seemed to glow, and he couldn't take his eyes from her face. And still, that echo was all he heard. Her next movement surprised him. Gojyo's eyes squeezed shut so tightly that Sanzo was certain it must be painful, and she balled a hand into a fist, punching the tiled wall behind the bathtub, growling obscenities as the ceramic squares shattered. Then, she let her arms hang over the edges of the tub, one dripping blood onto the floor, and leaned back, staring unseeingly at the ceiling.

What just happened? Confused, his heart beating wildly in his chest, he backed away from the door silently, and left the room without shutting the outer door. When he got back to his room, he collapsed onto the bed, shaking. _I'm going insane…I am, aren't I? _He couldn't be sure, but he thought that the voice in his head from earlier was cackling. Something told him that he wouldn't be getting to sleep any time soon. Images floated through his head insistently, torturing him until this mind formed new pictures, accompanied by phantom sensations, and suddenly, a sobbing moan grated from his throat.

She had been right. Damn it, that fucking hermaphroditic bitch…she was right. Then his own words came back to haunt him.

_So what if I want her? I don't** need** her. I don't need anything. _

He'd admitted aloud that he wanted, but denied needing Gojyo.

_I don't need her. I don't need anything…_

"Fucking crock of shit…" Drawing a deep, shaky breath, he let it out unsteadily, wondering what to do. He'd been lying, he now realized. But the goddess had known that. If he could make himself believe his own lie, it might be helpful, but he didn't think that was going to happen, what with the new and disturbingly vivid fantasies his mind had constructed.

There was only one thing left to do. When Sanzo had a problem, he did what most men did. He ignored it. And so he would.

* * *

It was unusually quiet as the Jeep crested the latest of endless sand dunes. Goku looked from Sanzo to Gojyo worriedly. They hadn't spoken a word to each other. Not for three whole days. Hakkai was acting strangely, too. He kept shooting hard looks at Sanzo. Gojyo was just staring out into nothing. When he'd asked her what was wrong, she just smiled, kind of sad like, and said everything was fine. Goku didn't think that she meant it. 

There was a very hostile kind of aura over the group, and he felt like there was some kind of fight waiting to break out. What happened when it did, and he wasn't prepared, because he didn't know what was going on?

He didn't like it. No, he didn't like it at all.

* * *

**A/N:** Well, there you go. There's less shit hitting the fan than originally planned, but I wasn't meaning for Hakkai to actually beat him down or anything. I have one _very_ interesting scene planned for the next part. There'll be dancing, jealousy, and maybe a fistfight (probably not a fistfight, though). I don't have it _that_ well hashed out yet. 


	5. Part V: Perhaps Perhaps Perhaps

**Title:** "Heartbreaker"

**Author: **antilogicgirl

**Fandom: **Gensomaden Saiyuki

**Genre: **Gender-benders

**Inspiration: **silly fan-art and swing music.

* * *

**Summary: **Gojyo breaks one too many hearts. The result? Well, it's both his dream come true, and the Ikko's worst nightmare, because his stint as a woman is quite permanent.

* * *

**A/N:** Oh, god. I'm so sorry for this. I've had this chapter done for AGES. But since the last time I posted, I've moved twice and there have been all sorts of issues, so I forgot to post (holds hand out for you to slap). I promise I won't do it again.

Inspirational Music: "Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps", as performed by Doris Day., and for the dance between Gojyo and Kougaiji, "Epoca" by the Gotan Project (a tango)

* * *

**Part V:** Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps

Sanzo breathed deeply, inhaling the hot, strange smell of sun, sand, and dust. The breeze created by the moving vehicle in which he sat did nothing to ease the heat. Hair was starting to stick to his forehead from sweat, his body losing water that it couldn't afford to with the dryness around them. He glanced into the side mirror of the Jeep for what had to be the hundredth time, catching a glimpse of the back seat. Goku was awake, watching the horizon eagerly for anything other than more sand, and Gojyo was curled up with her head in his lap, asleep. The monkey was running his fingers through her hair, and had a little smile on his face. Violet eyes followed the progress of those tanned digits as they slipped through blood red, raking paths through it again and again, causing a tiny, contented smile to form on the sleeping woman's lips. Sanzo felt the sudden urge to hit the boy.

That desire was quickly stifled. He chose instead to watch the lax features of the sleeping woman, and think about what she dreamt of, if anything. It had been a week and a half since he'd watched as she…his eyes closed at the memory, trying to push it away before he re-opened them. It was not something he wanted to remember. The shame of having found pleasure in that voyeuristic act burned hot in his chest, making him feel something that he almost never did: guilt.

Yes, it had been a week, regardless of what he was feeling now. And it had been a week since he'd slept. True to her word, the goddess was revealing her less than merciful side, coming to him in vocal form within his mind when he even thought of nodding off. So, he had developed dark circles under his eyes, and a tendency to stare at nothing at all in a rather dazed fashion. The quiet that had settled over the group was very strange. No one really spoke while they were driving. Hakkai, at least, had stopped looking at him as though he were going to murder him at any moment, but Goku just looked confused. Of course. The boy did not know what was going on, and Sanzo did not plan to enlighten him any time soon.

Gojyo did her best not to look at him, and she certainly did not speak to him. It was just as well. He supposed that any conversation they had would end in an argument that would spiral into violence and probably end with bloodshed. He was thankful that they were only half a day from a relatively large city. A city meant that even if Sanzo could not sleep, he could distract himself by reading the newspaper, or walking around giving everyone and everything a glare that kept them away from him with a berth of about three meters on all sides.

In spite of his original resolution to ignore this problem, he _was_ finding it difficult to do any such thing. Adding to the voice of the goddess in his head—which was bad enough—he also had this annoying thing called a conscience, which he was fairly unacquainted with…and it was now being anything but quiet. The blasted thing was nagging him. He was starting to feel like he had multiple personality disorder.

According to Hakkai, he had really hurt Gojyo. That, he did not understand. Had he said anything that was untrue? Sha Gojyo had slept with over a hundred women. In Sanzo's mind, that made the kappa a pretty big slut. So was it really that big of a jump of intellect to assume now that Gojyo was a woman…she might like to have sex with Sanzo? No. It was not inconceivable. And Gojyo had as much as admitted to being a bitch herself. So where was the problem? It was enough to make him want to pull his hair out.

_Women,_ he thought, _were certainly created simply to give men Migraine headaches._

His head only ached worse when he thought of how long things would drag out unless he actually talked to Gojyo about it. Sanzo estimated that he could go about two more days without sleep before he began hallucinating. Before that happened, he needed to do _something_. He really didn't want to apologize. Maybe if he just tried to discuss it calmly? There had to be some kind of miscommunication. He didn't mean to really insult Gojyo. He'd merely worked off of things that were common knowledge, and followed his instincts. And his instinct at the time was that those red eyes were telling him that she liked the way he was touching her.

The priest's eyes closed against the glare from the sun, and he turned away from the image in the mirror. He concentrated, blocking out first the sound of the wind in his ears, then the roar of the engine. When he was alone, floating in a vast and silent emptiness, he found himself surrounded by a white light. In this place, he knew, he was neither asleep nor awake. He hovered between waking and dream, no voices in his head, no Goddess to tell him what he needed, no evil temptress in the back seat. Here, he was himself. Genjyo Sanzo.

The light surrounding him soothed his mind, but like all escapes, it was temporary. Little external influence could disturb him in this state. But though he could not be disrupted from without, he was more vulnerable to his own inner conflict here. The white light began to fade before him, becoming a dim, smoky little room with cracked plaster and creaky floor-boards. The place smelled of cigarettes and whiskey, and he saw himself, holding onto Gojyo's hand.

His eyes looked up at her, almost pleadingly. _Pathetic_, he thought. _You're fucking pathetic, you know that?_ But all he could do was watch. His thoughts changed nothing in this scene. He couldn't change the way she walked away from him, or the way his face went from pained to angry in less than the time it took to bat an eyelash. Sanzo watched as his body moved, lashing out in anger. His hands connected with Gojyo's back, right between her shoulder blades, sending her to the floor, her arms windmilling until she barely caught herself.

In his vision, Gojyo's eyes were wide with surprise when he grabbed her shoulders to flip her onto her back. His own expression was strange, even to him. It looked almost like anger mixed with satisfaction. Thinking back, he remembered feeling something like triumph as he looked down at those enraged red eyes. And as she shouted at him, pushing at his chest, there was a very small smile on his face. She didn't mean those things. She couldn't. Sanzo remembered how he could feel the heat of her skin through her clothes, and how his body needed more of that warmth. Would she have been so warm if she hadn't wanted him?

Before the scene became unbearable, it vanished, in favor of another. A clearing in a forest at the desert's edge, barely lit by the sun revealed a very confused Gojyo, who was staring at Sanzo as if he'd grown another head. Smoke swirled around his head as he pulled out his gun and pointed it at her. He couldn't hear any words, but he didn't need to. Gojyo's hair hung in a tangled mass around her head, leaving near-black patches of wetness over the shoulders of the dark blue shirt she wore. These mesmerized him for a moment. Her weapon appeared, and she attacked him after he put the gun away. Sanzo had thwarted all of her advances easily, leaving the woman angered.

But then, he had reached out to take hold of her hips. He'd forced himself to be rough with Gojyo, refusing to let his fingers linger on that soft flesh, and then had her attack him again. The pain in his shoulder was reminiscent of the last time Gojyo had him on the ground, a long time ago. But that time, when the redhead had been protecting Hakkai, there had been no innuendo. Sanzo watched that insinuation leave her mouth, and saw the way her lips curled into a smile, her head tilting slightly to the right as it used to when looking at a woman. If that was a joke, it was only half a joke.

Wondering at the way this always seemed to turn into a way to second-guess his own actions, Sanzo shoved the images away, only to come finally to one of himself standing at a door, peeking in at the small crack. His shoulder leaned into the frame, steadying his body. His chest heaved, and his eyes were filled with disbelief, but also with longing. It was this longing that left him shaking in his bed, trying to make sense of what he felt, with no success. Just what _was_ it that he longed for? Touch? Heat? If that was all he needed, then why _her_?

Even the image of Gojyo's room at the inn faded away, leaving him in that endless void of white, alone with his questions, doubts, and that terrible, terrible longing.

* * *

Goku settled onto his bed in the inn. It was a nice place. They shared rooms, but it was just because the place was pretty booked. As usual, he shared with Gojyo. He ran a hand over the pillow on his bed. It was soft, and felt like it had been washed recently. "I like the beds here," he said offhandedly, trying to make conversation. There wasn't much of that to go around, and he was really starting to get nervous about that. Gojyo sat down on her own bed, and nodded.

"Beats the hell out of the last place, anyway." She started combing her fingers through her hair, which she had just washed. Frowning, Goku noted that she wasn't wearing her old t-shirt and boxer shorts. Instead, she was wearing a night-dress. It was blue, and had thin straps. It looked comfortable enough. He wondered absently what had happened to the old things she wore to bed, but didn't say anything about it.

Instead, he blurted, "Gojyo, when are you gonna tell me what happened? You haven't been talking much…and it's freaking me out." Her hands stopped where they were, tangled in long, thick, wet hair. She looked at him, her eyes wide, and her mouth opened, but shut again. "I know…I know it's none of my business. But I guess I'm worried, so could you please tell me?"

Sighing, she looked sideways at him. "You're not going to let this go, are you?" Goku shook his head stubbornly. "Stupid, hard-headed monkey…"

* * *

Sanzo's head was spinning. It might just pop right off at any moment, really. Something hard was pressing into his back…_Oh, yeah,_ he thought in a strangely amiable way, _that's the wall…_His head lolled to the side, vision blurring. "Hello, wall…" Then something was hurting his head, like some kind of rock or... "Ouch…whaddayawant?" The priest's head turned too fast for his liking, and he looked dazedly at a pair of golden eyes, which were wide with concern. "Go…ku?" Yes. It was the monkey. One of Sanzo's arms moved, reaching up and patting the shorter young man's head. "Hello, monkey."

There was a scuffling sound, and he felt himself being shaken. Hard. "Hakkai! Stop that!" Goku's voice said, and Sanzo saw a greenish-brownish blur a bit further off, and backing away. "Fix him!" that same voice yelled, and Goku backed stiffly away, but not very far. The greenish-brownish blur was getting taller…or was he sliding down the wall? A minute later, two hands grabbed the sides of his head, and he saw a very bright bluish light.

When the light was gone, he blinked. "What…what just happened?" His mouth hung open when his senses returned. The room was a shambles: the table was flattened, splintered, to the floor, while the lighting fixture hung off-kilter and several other pieces of furniture were toppled. The teacher was glaring at him, those green eyes still filled with barely-contained anger. Rather than ask him what happened, he turned to his ward. "Goku, what just happened?"

Hakkai turned a now rather flat gaze on him, and answered before Goku could get a word out. "I lost my temper. Goku has informed me of something that you did. Something rather…distressing." It was strange how he didn't remember anything. Shouldn't he? He must have been hit on the head pretty hard, what with the way he'd been babbling like an idiot, first of all, but to lose short term memory was really freaky. Then it sank in as to exactly what Hakkai meant, and he almost beat his head against the wall.

Sanzo groaned, eyes closing as he lowered his face into his palm. His muffled voice said, "She didn't…"

Hakkai cleared his throat, flexing his hands. Nearby, Goku was tensed. It seemed that Hakkai was still a bit on edge. The monkey had always been able to sense these things. The dark-haired man grimaced, his eyes narrowing. "And why _wouldn't_ Gojyo tell someone what you did?"

Goku put a hand on the dark-haired man's arm, clamping down with what had to be painful pressure. Hakkai didn't flinch. "Can you go and see what Gojyo's up to?" It was not a request. He looked pointedly at the demon-slayer, a hard set to his mouth, "I'm sure she'd like the company, and you can tell her about all the _noise_ you made." When Hakkai had retreated from the room, Goku helped him to his feet. He really _had_ slid down the wall into a crouched position. The aggression seemed to melt from Goku as soon as Hakkai was gone. "Sanzo…I…" The boy looked up at him with a wavering gaze, but then he saw determination harden in those golden eyes. "You can hit me if you want, Sanzo, but I was worried. You guys weren't talking to each other, and…It wasn't any of my business, but it felt like there was a time-bomb ticking…and I didn't know when it was gonna go off…"

Sanzo blinked at the young man, disbelieving. He wondered how he was going to deal with him. While he was a little angry at Goku for telling Hakkai what happened and nearly getting him killed, he also knew that it was only done out of concern. Not to mention that it would be terribly ungrateful of him to really hurt the little bastard after he'd been saved from getting his head bashed in. That didn't mean that his arm couldn't use a little exercise…

* * *

"Gojyo, do you really think that's such a good idea?" Hakkai was leaning against the wall just outside of the bathroom, his arms crossed over his chest as she was getting dressed to go out. He watched as a wad of bandages flew out of the door, landing on Gojyo's bed. Apparently, the bras they'd bought were itchy or chaffed—or at least that's what Gojyo had said—so she'd just started wrapping her chest. There was a rustling sound, like cloth being shaken out, before she answered him, her voice sounding exasperated with a bit of a desperate edge.

"I _need_ to get out, Hakkai. If I'm even in the same building with him, I just know I'll snap." More cloth rustled, and then there was a sound like a zipper being pulled.

_Snap…and do what, exactly?_ Hakkai wondered, pursing his lips. It had felt very satisfying to give Sanzo that concussion. Would she try to do the same? Hakkai had suspicions that had begun to surface about those two, and they didn't point toward more violence. If anything, there would be something much worse to deal with.

When Gojyo padded out of the bathroom, still shoving the hairpin he'd given her into the loose knot at the back of her head, something in his chest tried to tighten. Why had he let her buy the black dress? It wasn't that it was revealing. On the contrary. The hemline was just at her knees, and the neckline wasn't very low (only showing a little of her cleavage), but there was something in the way the straps sat on those slender shoulders…how the slinky fabric clung to her hips…

"How do I look?" she asked, turning in a circle.

Hakkai was speechless, except to say, "Beautiful." Gojyo's eyes widened in surprise at the compliment. Smiling as best he could, and afraid that it looked forced, Hakkai brushed away the one loose bit of hair that hung into her eyes. "You look beautiful." _You always look beautiful_, he didn't say, because it didn't need to be. Gojyo smiled nervously, looking away as a tiny blush dusted her cheeks. She was unused to being referred to in feminine terms, but there was no other way to say it. Gojyo was simply that: beautiful. But his friend had always been beautiful. Hakkai felt like he was losing something, something that he might never get back.

Did fathers feel that way when their daughters went out on dates? He supposed that they did, but it couldn't be quite the same thing. There was a swell of pride in his chest at seeing the way she moved so gracefully, how the handsome man she had been translated into exotic feminine beauty with a wild kind of allure. But maybe pride wasn't his to have? Or was it pride at all? Gojyo sat at the table, pulling on her boots and lacing them up. She didn't thank him. He didn't mind.

When she stood, Gojyo held out her arms. "Does the outfit say 'mean and unapproachable'?"

Hakkai laughed out loud. "If you're trying to keep people _away_, you'll have to wear a sign around your neck saying you've got a communicable disease."

An evil smile slid over Gojyo's face. In a display of shamelessness that only Sha Gojyo could achieve, she walked two fingers up his chest to hook a finger into his collar, pulling slightly so that his face lowered toward hers. There was a mischievous glint in her eyes, and Hakkai wasn't sure if he wanted to know what that was about. Her voice came out mocking and coy at the same time. "Why Cho Hakkai…if I didn't know any better, I'd say you were trying to flirt with me." Now it was his turn to blush, as he suddenly found the painting bolted to the wall to be rather interesting. Her hand let him go suddenly, and he could see her confusion from the corner of his eye. Understanding dawned in her surprised red eyes. "Oh, come on…you know I was just making fun." Hakkai nodded, but he couldn't bring himself to look at her. Such was awkwardness. "After all these years, I find something that embarrasses you, and it's _me_? Why didn't I think of that before?"

At that, he couldn't help looking back at a wide smile, and Hakkai found himself returning it. Every now and again, it felt like nothing had changed. Sometimes, if he looked at her in just the right light, he could still see the man inside the woman Gojyo now was. "What should I tell Goku?"

Tugging at the front of Hakkai's hair playfully, she said, "Tell that monkey I'll be back later, and that I promise not to bring in any strays. How's that?" Hakkai nodded, one of those nostalgic moments coming over him. If it hadn't been so surreal, seeing Gojyo wearing a dress, he'd think that it was the same old routine as always. That thought (along with all others) was shattered when she leaned over and brushed an awkward, impulsive kiss against his cheek. "Don't wait up, okay?" In his shock, all he could do was nod.

When she had left the room, he breathed, "Be careful," though he couldn't be sure if he was talking to the woman that just left, or himself.

* * *

After speaking to three old men on the street, Gojyo discovered that there was an entire district in this city specially reserved for those vices of less than honorable intent. A short walk brought her to a long avenue that was filled with brothels, bars, and dance clubs. Outside each was a man, whose job it was to get customers to come inside. Like hawkers at a bazaar, they called out nightly drink specials, the fact that there was no cover charge to get into the bars, or that there were nearly (or fully) naked women dancing within. As Gojyo was walking past one establishment, a large man with bright blue eyes and yellow hair grinned at her. "Hey, girlie…" when she raised one eyebrow at him he leaned forward, lowering his voice. "What are you looking for?"

One look over the man's large shoulders told her she didn't want to go into the place. It was just another strip club. And though it would be nice to see the ladies, it was like waving a steak in front of a starving dog. Those women had no intention of giving anyone anything except a show. The blonde at the door looked as if he were going to ask her if she wanted a job. _As if…_But, if there was one thing she knew, it was how to work people. Putting on the innocent, yet 'I-just-want-to-be-alone' routine, she put all her weight on one leg, her hips tilting. His eyes watched that intently. "Just a quiet drink. No loud music…maybe someplace where I can relax." One of her hands rose, giving a little tug at the collar of his shirt. "You got any idea where I could find that, sugar?"

The blonde man shrugged halfheartedly, a dejected look entering his blue eyes. "Sorry, sweetheart, but if you wanna relax, this ain't the place. You might try The Red Lotus Room. It's usually pretty quiet. You sure you won't come in?" The hopeful sort of light in his eyes was almost funny. When Gojyo had been a man, it hadn't escaped his notice how other poor suckers looked so sad and pathetic when a woman left the bar on his arm instead of theirs. But it had never occurred to the kappa to feel sorry for those guys. Now, though, it was a bit different.

"Not tonight. Maybe next time." With a parting smile, she turned around and walked further down the street, keeping an eye out for the place the man suggested and giving a little wave of thanks.

It was not until ten minutes later, when she was coming to the more derelict buildings, that she spotted a painted sign bearing a lotus blossom in cracked and peeling red lacquer. If that wasn't The Red Lotus Room, then she didn't know what was. Crossing the street, Gojyo noticed that there was no hawker, which was probably a plus. It meant one of two things: either one was not necessary because no one went near the place anyway, or because it had a reputation. This was the kind of place she'd always liked. Quiet, with a set of regulars that usually kept to themselves. There was music, but it was not too loud, floating out of the door to her. "This'll do nice-like."

When she walked in, she figured from the look of the place, it was probably operated by organized crime. The Red Lotus Room might look like a shit-hole from the outside, but the interior was well kept. Tables were set up with candles in the center, a decent number of people sitting around and drinking anything from tea to tequila, or munching on snacks. Booths with black leather upholstery lined the back wall, conveniently darkened for shady business. The bar was lit up in white, while the small dance floor was cast in a soft blue by the hanging lanterns above it. A little stage in one corner had a band seated there; playing music that no one danced to, under similar lanterns in red. The overall effect made Gojyo comfortable. From the looks of the other customers, this was indeed a place where gangsters came to drink. No one started fights in this kind of place if they wanted to keep their heads.

* * *

Sanzo grunted in irritation. Why? That was a question he'd been asking himself a lot, of late. Why did Gojyo have to sleep with a gypsy and get turned into a chick? Why did he put up with all of these idiots? Why did he have to be sitting by the window earlier once he'd finished smacking Goku into submission, and _just happen_ to see a flash of red hair walking south on the street? And the most important of the 'why' questions: why did he have to follow her?

Now dressed in street clothes snatched from his bag and hurriedly thrown on, Sanzo flitted from shadow to shadow, watching Gojyo from a distance of ten meters. She seemed to be looking for something since she talked to that bouncer a few minutes ago. The redhead moved slowly toward a building on the opposite side of the street, stopping briefly to take stock of the place before entering. Sanzo followed, keeping to the shadows and ending up standing with his back to the wall of the alley on the side of the bar. Stealthily, he peeked around the corner. _Damn, does she have shitty taste in bars…_The building looked like it was going to fall down.

Nevertheless, he proceeded deeper into the alley in search of a side door. There must be one in this kind of place. It was the type of establishment that people were dumped into the alley after being beaten senseless and robbed, he was sure. No more than twenty feet down the wall; he found what he was looking for. It was a metal door, dented and scratched, with several bullet holes in the upper left, but it obviously was still functioning. Now that he thought about it, this was probably a very bad idea. There was no telling what he would see once he got inside.

Whatever it was, he could handle it, he decided. Sanzo had come this far, and wouldn't turn back now. The handle of the door was a bit sticky, but he managed to turn it quietly enough, pulling it open and letting himself in. Once inside, he came to the very swift realization that no…it wasn't a great idea. The hallway was narrow and dark, and lined with doors. There were loud moaning noises coming from behind one of them, and he winced when they echoed off of the concrete floor. Was this a bar, or a brothel? Before he could discover the answer to that question, he moved quietly down the passage, and peeked around the adjoining corridor in both directions. One way led to more doors like the ones he'd just seen, while the other seemed to go toward the main area of the bar.

He took the left fork, and proceeded into the bar, coming out near the restrooms and then slipping out into a dark area where he moved to sit unnoticed in a black-upholstered booth. It didn't take long to locate Gojyo. Her hair seemed to glow in the lights from the bar back. Most of the other patrons seemed to be in their mid to late thirties, and wore cheap suits. One of his eyebrows twitched upward. Gangsters. Most of the men in the place seemed to be ignoring the redhead that was currently seated at the bar on a red stool. That was evidence enough that they were absorbed in something that was more important than womanizing.

* * *

Gojyo gave a contented sigh. The Scotch was good. She supposed that one good thing about taking all of Sanzo's money in cards was that she always drank well afterward. The old bartender swabbed the counter and asked if she would like another glass. With a nod, she indicated that she would, and watched the old man as he bustled around behind the bar. He was an old hand at this kind of thing, it was clear. But Gojyo was pretty sure that other than booze, there was probably a small arsenal behind that oak counter. No one ever expected it, but bartenders were the ones you really had to watch out for in a bar fight.

They could finish a fight _very_ quickly, and get rid of any evidence that it had occurred faster than you could spit. But for the moment, the old guy was just pouring drinks, since no one was stupid enough to make any trouble. The small glass in her hand clinked when she shook it, and Gojyo watched the ice move when she turned it this way and that. It was pretty, the way the light from the bar back reflected in the facets of the glass, and then the ice, fracturing it into a hundred tiny shards of white and throwing it out like flawed diamonds.

A glass was set in front of her, the familiar amber liquid filling it in a double. She pulled her money from her boot to pay the man, but was surprised when he said that someone else had already purchased the drink. "Hm? Who?" The man's gnarled finger pointed over her shoulder, and Gojyo turned. Her red eyes immediately met purple. One eyebrow rose as she took in the rest of her alcoholic benefactor.

While she usually wasn't one to turn down a free drink, this time, it was tempting. Hair in a violent shade of scarlet was hanging in front of those violet eyes, and Gojyo didn't really know what to make of the fact that Kougaiji had just bought her a drink. He was just standing there behind her, arms folded with an expectant look on his face. Maybe she was in shock. Maybe. That could explain why she just made a grunting noise and turned back around in her seat to partake of the offered drink. Or, _maybe_ she was just annoyed at being disturbed.

Apparently, the demon had some particular reasoning for intruding upon her solitude, because he slid onto the stool nearest her and leaned on the bar. _Persistent bastard, isn't he? You would think that he'd know when he was being given the brush-off._ That did not, however, appear to be the case. He simply sat there, looking at her, until Gojyo became annoyed and turned her head toward him. "What?" she snapped, turning the rest of her body toward him and waiting for an answer.

For some ungodly reason, Kougaiji looked _amused_. "And here I _thought_ I could at least get a 'hello' before you got belligerent with me." Gojyo blinked at him. She couldn't figure this guy out. He usually just wanted to beat the snot out of any one of Gojyo's little group, but now…she smirked evilly around the rim of her glass. Kougaiji was _hitting on her_.

Oh, this is rich…just wait until the monkey hears this…

The seat gave a little squeak as she swiveled a bit, crossing her legs while making a show of straightening her skirt. Gojyo's voice came out in an oddly sweet tone. "I'm not generally in the habit of being civil with people who've tried to kill me repeatedly. Why should I start now?" Those purple eyes narrowed for an instant before the man smiled while turning fully toward her. Kougaiji's lips then stretched in an expression she had never thought him capable of: a smile. If Gojyo hadn't been in shock before, she certainly was now. It wasn't a cocky grin like some she'd seen him have when he was fighting with Goku. Somehow, his entire face was transformed.

The fact that he was easy on the eyes when he flashed his pearly whites did _not_ mean that she was without the desire to slap him when he exhibited that familiar attitude of smugness. One corner of that smile tilted a bit higher than the other, and he said in a tone that could only be described as smooth, "I'm not trying to kill you _now_, am I?" _Smart ass…_ Gojyo could have just beaten that smile off of his face.

It was too late, though, because her curiosity was piqued. What the Hell was he doing, if he wasn't trying to bait her into a fight? "Fine," she grumped, leaning back against the chrome of the stool's back and crossing her arms under her breasts. "I'll bite. What _are_ you doing?"

That question seemed to be exactly what he'd wanted to hear. That same smile came over his face as he slid off of his stool, extending a hand to her just as the music from the band changed. "I'm asking you to dance."

What was the word that Hakkai liked to use in situations that were too weird to really be happening? Oh, yeah. _Surreal._ This was as surreal as it got. Kougaiji was holding out a hand and asking if she'd dance with him, as if they had never tried to murder one another. Was it the situation, or the Scotch that was making her head spin the way it did? "No." Her answer was simple, to the point, and _should_ have gotten through. But it didn't. Kougaiji, being the relentless bastard that he was, took her free hand and slid her off of the barstool. Though she tried to pull away, his grip on her fingers held fast. "Are you deaf, you little mama's boy? I said no."

A smirk came over his lips. "Maybe you're scared to dance with me?" At such a suggestion, Gojyo immediately bristled.

"Scared? Why would I be scared of dancing with _you_?" She looked Kougiji up and down, sizing him up. _Son of a bitch... _Something about this situation screamed that she should walk away. But there was that old spark of competition blazing in her belly now, making her step closer, her voice dripping menace, "What would _I_ have to be afraid of?"

The hand holding hers had still not let go, and he pulled hard, causing Gojyo to be pressed against him. She took a step back. Kougaiji let go of her, and then took two steps deeper into the dance floor, with a smirk that challenged her to come closer, if she dared. And who the hell was he to say that she was scared?

His smirk became so self-assured that she again wanted to just smash it off. "You never know. You might even _like_ it." _What a bastard…that's it. _Well, there was only one way to show the son of a bitch that she wasn't scared.

At first, it was more a prelude to a fight than a dance. The music had a rough, almost aggressive beat. Gojyo stepped forward, two of her shorter strides, glaring up into eyes that looked almost black under the blue light and walked around Kougaiji slowly, while he turned in place, watching her. It was as if they were gauging each other for the coming battle. Then he stepped forward, causing her to step back, now toward the middle of the dance floor. Gojyo then stepped directly up to the crimson-haired demon, getting as close as she dared while glaring at him suspiciously. She could feel his breath on her face, but she didn't touch him.

A hand snaked around her waist, pressing into the middle of her back. It pulled at her, and Gojyo found herself pressed to a well-muscled chest. To say the least, she was surprised by how different this felt from the way it had when she was a man. The feeling of being held—not being the one doing the holding—was strange, and felt slightly wrong. Kougiaji stepped forward, forcing her back, his free hand grasping hers, and then moving them to the side. Gojyo gripped at the arm that held her to keep her balance. "Bastard," she growled.

There was a tiny tick at the corners of his mouth, the barest hint of a smile. His grip changed, and her arm was suddenly crossing over her body as he turned her, trapping her back against his chest. His breath tickled at the skin of her cheek, and then she felt lips on her neck as he spoke. "I like you when you're angry, Gojyo."

Suddenly, she could feel laughter bubbling up in her chest, which she quickly stifled. When he turned her again, spinning her out before pulling her close once more, her lips curled into a devilish grin. This was utterly ridiculous. Apparently, Kougaiji didn't know much at all about Gojyo, because if he did, he would know that it was useless to try to play her. After all…you can't play a player. The way she saw it, she had one of two options at this point. The first of which would be to let him know that he was very much out of his depth, while the second was to _show him._ Now, _that_ sounded fun. Hell, if it was for her entertainment, she could work him up pretty well and then just leave. Internally having a laugh at Kougaiji's expense, she said, "You'd like me better when I'm not," her voice came out in something close to a purr as she slid both hands up his arms. Gojyo's lips curled into an enticing smile, "so why don't you try to get on my good side?"

* * *

Sanzo's eyes narrowed. What in the name of the Buddha was that woman doing? He watched as her hands slid over the shoulders of Kougaiji's worn white shirt, red eyes fixing on the demon's face in a way that made him grip the table's edge. Gojyo was smiling. Was she enjoying herself _that_ much?

* * *

As Kougaiji led her around the floor gracefully—but still aggressively—Gojyo made every possible attempt at ensuring his discomfort, and consequently her own enjoyment. He turned her again, pulling her in until her back was against his chest, and she made sure to lean back against him, her head falling back against his shoulder. They swayed, and Gojyo felt one of his hands release hers, only to travel up her arm to the back of her neck. Nearly snorting at this action, she smirked and stepped away while turning in his grip. One arm looped over his neck, and her right foot hooked behind his left before she slid her leg up his.

This was like a competition, but also a kind of taunting. It reminded her a little of the way she behaved with Sanzo. But thinking of the monk at the moment might prove to be disastrous. Aggressive the dance was, but it wasn't personal. Not for her. That might change if she started thinking about recent events. Because if she really thought about it, and wanted to really burst the bubble of denial she'd been in, that smoking, drinking, son-of-a-bitching monk had gotten under her skin like a parasite, digging in and worming his way down deep. So deep, she feared, that he was wedged in where Gojyo wouldn't be able to pry him out again. _Dangerous thoughts, honey. Keep your brain in the here and now._

Both feet now firmly on the floor, they moved in the blue light of the dance floor again, their motions remaining forceful, teasing. "How _does_ a man get on your good side?" the demon asked as they neared the rear of the dance floor. His face was very close, and all she could really see was a set of purple eyes that seemed to be daring her to do something. _Hook, line, and sinker, baby…_she thought when they came to the first of the darkened booths and her fingers closed on the necklace he wore, pulling slightly in amusement.

Their feet stopped moving. Gojyo could feel it coming. His breath was too close for it to _not_ happen. And to be completely honest, Gojyo had kissed enough girls to know that feeling of expectation just before two sets of lips connected. It was like a tight, almost-warm sensation in the middle of your gut, and it didn't release until your tongue was down someone else's throat. Kougaiji's lips came within a hair's breadth of hers before she answered him. _How does a man get on my good side, Kougaiji? _"Depends on the man," Her hands planted themselves in the middle of his chest, pushing hard. "You're not there yet."

Kougaiji took a step toward her, and she backed away, seeing the determined look on his face. His eyes narrowed to thin slits and he began to frown. "Tease," he accused.

Gojyo's smile was malicious. "It's just a dance. I'll be seeing you, Kougaiji." She gave him a cocky little salute, and then walked gracefully back to the bar, where she seated herself and took a sip of her drink. From the corner of her eye, she saw him standing there, staring at her for a long moment before he started leaving the bar. His tense posture told her everything she needed to know. Kougaiji was not used to being rejected. Well, he'd just have to _get_ used to it. _Stupid mama's boy…_

There were murmurs circulating throughout the bar now, probably from the men sitting around and staring at her. They were probably thinking that she was a huge tease, but it didn't bother Gojyo in the least. Really, that assertion was pretty true, since she'd done all that on purpose. The old bar tender approached, leaning on the polished wood of the bar. "You sure you know what you're doing, messing with a man's head like that, missy?"

Setting the glass down, she said with a frown, "Better than you know, pops." Gojyo tapped the rim of her glass. "I'll do this again." The old man hobbled away to fetch the requested drink, and Gojyo swallowed the now watered down remainder of the Scotch in her glass. She sat for a few moments staring at the light in the ice cubes, thinking about all of the shit that had been going on since that fucking gypsy had gone all hocus-pocus and given Gojyo breasts and a few other problems that hadn't been there before. In the past few days, she'd had to come to grips with some rather uncomfortable truths.

It seemed, for instance, that her tenure as the resident girl would be of some duration; Gojyo had resigned herself to that. Another of these annoying facts was that her attraction to that blonde asshole was getting worse, rather than going away since the Bourbon incident. Shit, she'd actually touched herself. Not that Sha Gojyo was any stranger to the masturbatory arts…but she had held off the exploration of her new body. It just didn't seem real. But when she'd done that, there was only one thing she could think of. _For fuck's sake, it was so _hard_ to make him stop…_ Her head gave a little shake to try clearing her thoughts, not that it actually worked. This was why she had to get out of the inn.

If she were even in the same building with him, as she'd told Hakkai earlier, Gojyo would snap. She'd walk right into his room, beat him to a pulp, and then maybe see if he was still pretty enough to hold her interest. Or something like that. _Or, _she thought, _you could have shooed anyone else out of the room and fought dirty again…_That train of thought almost drew a smile, but was cut off very quickly, as the word 'dirty' had taken on a completely different connotation. Right now, she was just glad that Kougaiji was gone. It had been a little dangerous there, for a minute. Damn those eyes. They were much like Sanzo's, except for those creepy slit pupils. The way they looked at her was different, too, though. While Gojyo wasn't sure what to make of the expression in the monk's eyes when he looked at her, it was all too easy to read the red-haired man's gaze. Those purple eyes said one thing, loud and clear: want.

Kougaiji wanted Gojyo. _Fuck that. _If there was one thing she didn't need, it was a meaningless fling with that mother-fucker. He was always trying to kill them, sending his flunkies, or just coming on his own. The bastard had tempted fate too many times by fighting with Goku, even in his non-limited state (crazy fucker…). She growled to herself a bit as she took her new drink and paid the man. Kougaiji was more of an annoyance now than he was before! Well, she could hope that they didn't run into each other again alone. Maybe next time, her brother would be there? He was going to get a kick out of her new look. Or, he could possibly be freaked out by it. Gojyo wouldn't blame him if he were. _Cross that bridge when I come to it…_

Deep in thought, Gojyo stirred her drink with a slender finger. The liquor was chilled, and burned her tongue pleasantly when she put that digit into her mouth. Suddenly, she felt very alone. Maybe she should have asked Hakkai to come along? It probably would have kept Kougaiji away if he had been with her, which would have been helpful. Leaning on her hand, she sighed while a guitar was being plucked delicately in the far corner. Or maybe it was a mandolin? The music was soft, kind of floating, making Gojyo sink a bit deeper into the funk that settled over her mind.

A halting melody filled the air, taunting her. It was the kind of song that lovers danced to. The Scotch took on a taste that resembled Bourbon, and Gojyo's eyes drooped close to shutting. Phantom tickles of sensation traveled up her neck, like a physical memory. Her lips parted, letting out a breath when she imagined a hand on her shoulder. It was a gentle weight, hesitant and warm. Oh, this was bad. Gojyo knew her imagination was running away with her. It was just like what happened in the bathtub the other day.

Just the memory of the way blonde hair had tickled at her cheek, how lips had trailed over her skin, it made her forget the fact that there was a certain amount of shame involved in relinquishing control. The thought of how it had felt was interrupted when the imagined hand on her shoulder slid lower, grasping her upper arm to turn her on her stool. And that was when she realized. It wasn't her imagination. When her eyes opened wide in surprise, the light from the bar back caught a pair of dark amethyst-colored eyes. For half an instant, Gojyo thought that perhaps Kougaiji had returned.

Then she saw the pale skin of this interloper's face, the small, circular red tattoo that was almost hidden by ash blonde hair… "Sanzo?" Something close to panic rose up in Gojyo's stomach. Hadn't she gone out to get _away _from him? His hand, still on her arm, slid further still, until he held her fingers in his. The priest's face held an odd expression, and he did not answer. He only pulled gently, and Gojyo slid easily from the stool. It was strange, how she didn't really mind that gentle pressure against her fingers. And it was no less strange when he pulled her toward his body, one hand lying gently at her waist while the other held her hand.

The reality of the situation hit her with the force of a heavy blow. Her hand gripped at the soft black cloth of Sanzo's sleeve, as if to stop him from running away. His eyes rested on her heavily, that odd light in them that she still couldn't identify. Gojyo's mouth was dry. Why was he here? He moved smoothly backward, maneuvering them into the middle of the floor. "What—" her voice halted after a second, those burning violet eyes silencing her.

Why couldn't she just talk? Damn his eyes.

"You left without saying anything," Sanzo said quietly, looking away and turning them slightly while stepping forward, Gojyo following his lead effortlessly. That wasn't true.

"I told Hakkai." Gojyo's voice seemed so small in her ears. The priest's jaw tightened, and she realized what he meant. And it made her angry. "Do I have to tell you everything, Sanzo?" Her voice hissed out, and she watched his head snap back, their eyes locking. What right did he have to order her around? Gojyo was and always had been the master (mistress, now) of her own fate, and was no one's property or servant. She wasn't going to allow herself to be ordered around. And then she realized that there was something suspicious about his presence in the first place. "You followed me." It was not a question.

His grip on her waist tightened and he glared at her. "It's a good thing that I did, too."

Gojyo fixed him with a wry look. "Do you think I can't handle myself in social situations? Pardon me for saying so, but of the two of us, _you're_ the social retard." Color rose in those pale cheeks, though it was not a blush, but a flush of anger. Sanzo shouldn't get angry at the simple truth being stated. When it came down to it, the monk had the tact of a brick, the patience of a stick of dynamite (with a half-inch fuse), and the finesse of a cow. And he didn't realize this _how_?

"So…" the blonde man moved them around the floor, still talking. They hadn't stopped moving yet, she realized. "So you're saying that I should mind my own business?" Gojyo watched his eyes carefully. His tone was dangerous. What she said next could result in a gun being aimed at her. And she was _so_ not dressed for a fight.

She didn't want to fight. Not right now. It had been so nice for a minute there… "Sanzo, can we just _not_ talk?" Gojyo asked, feeling her body tensing. Sanzo gave a small, jerky nod, his hand sliding up to the center of her back and pressing her closer. Hair tickled her cheek, and she could smell spent tobacco and gun oil over a warmer, earthy scent that made her breathe in deeply. Sanzo's fingers touched the skin of her back just above where her dress stopped, and Gojyo's breath stopped. That familiar haze was settling over her now, clouding her mind and taking all reason away.

Her hand moved up to Sanzo's shoulder, feeling the firmness of the muscle beneath. It was different. Different from a few minutes earlier, when Kougaiji had dragged her out onto the floor. That had been a challenge—one she should have walked away from—and it had been wrong on so many levels. This didn't feel wrong. She smiled a little and shifted closer.

Sanzo made an inquisitive noise near her ear. She said quietly, "This feels nice."

"It does." Sanzo's elegant fingers stroked at the skin of her back. _God, that feels good…_ "Gojyo," his voice was low and serious. When she pulled away from him just enough to look into his face again, he said, "About the other night—" _Oh, hell no…_She wasn't going to let him ruin the moment by bringing up the Bourbon incident. That had ended as a fiasco, and this would be the same way if he didn't shut that pouting mouth of his.

"Shut it." He blinked down at her after she said that. A half-smile spread over her lips. "You wanna make it up to me?" Sanzo looked at her dumbly. "Don't talk, stupid." When was he going to realize that even if he _was_ socially retarded, she didn't care? He might be arrogant, and make assumptions that were utterly uncalled for, resulting in her beating his ass, but that was just Sanzo. And apparently, he was pretty thick at the moment. At least he wasn't talking. But he looked like he might. His mouth opened, confirming her suspicions. Exasperated, she growled, "Not a word about it. You were gloriously pissed out of your mind, and I was pissed _at you_. Fuck, I'm still pissed at you. But…"

Sure, she'd been really mad. He'd called her a bitch and a whore, and even then, there was enough estrogen raging through Gojyo's system to give her the proper female response to _that_ treatment. And afterward, it had been so _awkward_ even to be in the same room as Sanzo…but after a while, she did realize that he'd been drunker than she'd ever seen him before, and he probably didn't have the best judgment. Purple eyes were looking down into hers expectantly, waiting for the rest of what she was saying. "Ah, what the fuck…" her voice came out exasperated, "…just fucking kiss me already, you moron."

* * *

What? What had she just said? Sanzo suddenly couldn't really seem to breathe properly. He was pretty sure that she had demanded that he kiss her. Was that even possible? He wanted to. But if he did, what would happen? Would things progress, becoming something that might lead to a serious kind of attachment? _God, I don't think I could handle that…_Or would it be just a kiss?

His rapid-fire thought processes were interrupted by Gojyo again. "Wow…deaf _and_ stupid." Sanzo's eyes narrowed, and he opened his mouth to let an insult fly. Nothing came out, because he found her mouth pressed against his. His body reacted immediately, stopping the movement of his feet, and letting go of Gojyo's hand so that he could have both arms around her. The kiss was nowhere near chaste, or gentle. It was too desperate for either sentiment. Sanzo could feel his heart beginning to race, and Gojyo's breathing picking up speed. His tongue probed indelicately at every surface it could, while Gojyo's did the same. Neither of them seemed to want to stop, even when air was becoming a rare commodity.

Finally, Gojyo took two handfuls of his hair and pulled, breaking their mouths forcefully apart. She panted, "I'll give you an 'A' for effort, monk, but you should work on your technique. You busted my lip." Indeed, there was a bead of crimson liquid forming on Gojyo's lower lip. Strangely, Sanzo couldn't remember tasting blood. Smirking lightly, Sanzo leaned forward and licked at the fresh wound, the coppery taste of blood coating his tongue. Almost unaware of what he did, the priest gently lapped up every trace of blood before delving into Gojyo's mouth once again in a more thoughtful, lingering way.

When he pulled back, Gojyo was grinning. Sanzo gave a snort at the dopey expression. "Was that better?" He teased, watching the way one slender red eyebrow rose, irritation evident on Gojyo's face. Her hands tugged at his hair.

"Don't get cocky, sutra-boy." Short nails bit into the skin of his neck before releasing. "I don't want to have to kick your ass. It ain't lady-like." That statement amused Sanzo. He gave a short laugh. When had Gojyo learned what a lady was _supposed _to act like? The women that had been interested in the kappa were not _ladies _by any stretch of the imagination. Gojyo growled, "You're asking for it, Sanzo."

* * *

**A/N:** (does her very best Oliver Twist voice) Please sir/ma'am, may I have a review?


End file.
